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My 19 year old son is drinking and driving, what can I do when his doesn't listen to me?

My 19 year old son is drinking and driving. My husband did not approve of his drinking so he moved out over a year ago. His grandmother called me last week and told me he had wreck his truck, later I found out he was drinking. My parents have giving him a job, home and probably another truck (now). They have made it easy for him to support his habit, just to have a cheap laborer. I love my son and want to help him what can I do?

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bulldog2013

Asked by bulldog2013 at 4:08 PM on Oct. 22, 2013 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 1 (3 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • Grandparents need to cut him off. With no vehicle he can't drive. Not much you can do at this point.
    PartyGalAnne

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 4:11 PM on Oct. 22, 2013

  • He will learn the hard way.
    virginiamama71

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 4:12 PM on Oct. 22, 2013

  • If you know when he's going to be out, you could turn over his plate number to the police. There's not much you can do when an adult child is hell bent on destruction. Just pray he doesn't hurt himself or an innocent person. I feel the same way about my 22 y/o son who I know texts & drives. That's just as dangerous, but he won't listen. I pray every time he leaves the house. :(
    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 4:14 PM on Oct. 22, 2013

  • Call the police before he kills some innocent person!
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 4:15 PM on Oct. 22, 2013

  • are you funding the truck, insurance, gas, tabs, etc? if so there's an easy fix
    hibbingmom

    Answer by hibbingmom at 4:24 PM on Oct. 22, 2013

  • Not much you can do since he is an adult. It would be best if the grandparents stopped enabling him but the may think it is loving him and that will be a hard idea to change.
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 4:25 PM on Oct. 22, 2013

  • I have an uncle who was a chronic drunk driver. The plate number of the car he drove was turned over to the local police so that patrol officers could keep an eye on it. They got to know that car well and after a while, they'd stop it whenever they saw it, no matter who was driving it. The car eventually had to be sold in another city because anyone who drove it would be inconvenienced. Fortunately for everyone, my uncle no longer has a license or access to a car, but you can definitely tip off the police that a truck with a certain description and plate number is often driven by someone who is intoxicated, and they'll take it seriously.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 4:33 PM on Oct. 22, 2013

  • If you're not paying for any of it stay out of it. He will learn the hard way & you can go visit him in jail.
    funlovinlady

    Answer by funlovinlady at 4:41 PM on Oct. 22, 2013

  • Tell the grandparents that if they give him a truck, knowing that he is going to drink and drive, OR if they furnish the alcohol, then they are just as legally responsible for anything he does. My 18 year old son drove when he was high, (my car!!!), and the cops came to my house. If I had supplied the pot, or had knowingly let him drive my car, they were going to ticket me as well. Luckily he hadn't hurt anyone, so all he got was a DUII rather than hurting an innocent person, AND I was at work when it happened, and he took my car without my knowledge, so nothing happened to me. But it wold have.... Let the grandparents know this. He may not be a minor, but he is under 21...
    Nimue930

    Answer by Nimue930 at 4:48 PM on Oct. 22, 2013

  • If you're not paying for any of it stay out of it. He will learn the hard way & you can go visit him in jail.
    funlovinlady Answer by funlovinlady 8 minutes ago

    ^^^That's assuming he doesn't kill himself or some innocent person first. What could a phone call to the police hurt? Doing nothing could cause more harm & at least OP can say she tried.
    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 4:51 PM on Oct. 22, 2013

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