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Should I write a letter to the teacher or not?

My daughter has always done very well with English, but the teacher she has had for the past two years has changed all that and she is now not doing as well as she could. In preparation of a parent's meeting with the teacher, I sent her proof of past grades and results of an aptitude test where it shows that languages is her strongest asset. It is clear that the teacher did not read this, that she had made up her mind that my daughter is a 5 out of 7 teacher and that nothing she can do can help her improve. Is it normal for a teacher to tell a student that she cannot do better than a 5? Should I write a letter to the teacher to tell what effect her negative attitude has on my daughter? If I do, wont it just make matters worse? My daughter (and her friends in class) are convinced that this teacher does not like her - should I mention this to the teacher? I am really at a loss of what to do and seeing my daughter struggle with this is torture. Please help!  She is in her final year of school (IB diploma) and this teacher is making it so much harder.

Answer Question

Asked by Diets123 at 6:29 PM on Nov. 4, 2013 in Teens (13-17)

Level 3 (14 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • Your child has a right to receive the best education that she can. I would not even stop there, I would go straight to administration. If you and your child are not satisfied, you BECOME satisfied... whatever that takes (within reason, of course).....LOL

    Answer by m-avi at 6:32 PM on Nov. 4, 2013

  • Should I write a letter to the teacher to tell what effect her negative attitude has on my daughter - NO.... go in for a FACE TO FACE ASAP!!

    convinced that this teacher does not like her - should I mention this to the teacher? YES... ask her what is happening that could make her feel this way... again... face to face!!!

    What is an IB diploma ??

    Answer by Crafty26 at 6:39 PM on Nov. 4, 2013

  • If ANY teacher tells a child they cannot do better, then they have actually admitted they are a shitty teacher!! A teacher is there to teach. If the student is willing to learn, then the teacher should not set limits on that. Ive been a teacher, and I would be livid at any teacher who said that to a student. I'd go demand a better teacher... this one is obviously inadequate.

    Answer by Nimue930 at 6:42 PM on Nov. 4, 2013

  • IB is International Baccalaureate. Very prestigious, high level program.

    There is definitely a problem with the teacher and you need face time with her. I only have one question: Has your daughter already been in IB or Pre-AP classes? Just wondering if the step up in demand might be correlated here

    Answer by gdiamante at 6:50 PM on Nov. 4, 2013

  • I would request a meeting w/ the principal. Sounds like the teacher isn't willing to do her job to help your child improve. To tell her all she will ever be is a 5 is a defeatist attitude & a disservice to your child and anyone like her who want to try.

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 7:23 PM on Nov. 4, 2013

  • My senior high English teacher told me not to bother taking the AP test because I wouldn't even get a 3. It just made me work harder. Got a 5 (highest in my school) and took it in to show her. Thanked her for being such a bitch because it made me work harder.

    I would have been mortified if my mom had stepped in and said something to that teacher. Does your daughter want you to say or do anything?

    Answer by kmath at 11:08 PM on Nov. 4, 2013

  • My French teacher told me that I was wasting my time and that I'd never speak French. I was 16 at the time. I took it as motivation ("Wanna bet?!"), studied languages at university, taught English in France, married a Frenchman and am now so perfectly bilingual that most people don't realize I wasn't born here.

    Answer by goldpandora at 3:46 AM on Nov. 5, 2013

  • Thank you all for your very valuable responses. @mrsmom110 : You are right - my daughter will be horrified if I do see the teacher about this. @kmath: her reaction was definitely "wanna bet", which made it even more difficult to know if seeing/writing the teacher would be the right thing. I will give it a few days to let my anger abate before I make my decision. @Nimeu930. She finished Gr 9 in a public school, then did half a year of Gr 10 when we relocated. She completed Gr 11 (IB) and is now busy with Gr 12(IB).

    Comment by Diets123 (original poster) at 8:54 AM on Nov. 5, 2013

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