Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Have you ever snapped?

Ok i know this is going to make me sound like the worst mother ever and trust me I feel like it. Well today have been extremely stressful with trying to do house work and school and dealing with four kids. Well today I was trying to get my four yr old to clean his room while I did my home work, and then i found him up stairs and he had gotten into the toothpaste and had it all over my bathroom and I snapped!! I spanked my him for the first time in my life and I felt so bad that I started crying harder then him, called my husband to tell him what happened. He told me that it happens sometimes and that his mother snapped on him when he was younger and it upset her more then him, and after that she never touched him again. I feel horrible and even a worse mother. Have any you moms ever snapped on your kids?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:02 PM on Feb. 19, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (13)
  • Are you kidding? I have three teenagers. My middle child who is 16 started back talking me I told her to stop, she said what are you going to do hit me? I said yes, she said go ahead and I did. . Not proud of it, but she hit me back. So hard I saw stars. Yikes.
    The thing is sometimes situations happen, we are human. We snap. It puts things in check. Your kid, like mine will know watch out mom can snap.
    There are no perfect parents sometimes things go arye. Learn the lesson and forgive yourself.
    mmmegan38

    Answer by mmmegan38 at 5:14 PM on Feb. 19, 2009

  • Yes I have done this. I was raising my 3 young boys by myself for awhile while their dad worked in another state. I would call him in tears every other week! Don't feel bad, it happens and all we can do is try not to let it happen again. But if it does don't tear yourself down. Sounds like you have an understanding husband who you can talk to about this.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:11 PM on Feb. 19, 2009

  • No, you are NOT a bad mother for the sole reason that you realize what you did is not the best way to raise your child. Sadly many parents do things like this on a regular basis and think it's okay. You are human and emotions got the better of you, and I am sure you will look back on this experience and know that it isn't something you want to do to your child and you will be better for it.

    Now, if you said "he had the toothpaste all over and I smashed his head into the wall" ... then that would be another story.

    Just be sure to talk to him about what happened, and from here on out when you feel you are losing control, make sure your son is in a safe place like his room and walk away for a few minutes, take deep breaths.

    I honestly have come SO close to smacking my 2 year old that I was like shaking, but luckily I never have and hopefully never will.

    *hugs* Ya'll are gonna be okay :)
    Arkaidy

    Answer by Arkaidy at 6:14 PM on Feb. 19, 2009

  • Well, we all do that. At least he'll probably never do that w/ the toothpaste again. And you know what, he should not have done that, that is like the icing on the cake. Don't worry, you are not a bad mom.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:16 PM on Feb. 19, 2009

  • Yes I do snap. It's normal. I snap when my kids feel the need to do exaclty the opposite of what I askd them not to do. Spanking your children because they disobeyed is not wrong. Beating them is wrong and yes there is a difference.
    He was told to do one thing and did another. That warrants for some sort of punishment. Then another punishment for using toothpaste like it was paint.
    Maybe I'm a mean mother but when it comes to kids they need to understand they have boundaires that shouldnt be crossed.
    JMO.
    Please don't feel bad. Your child will love you the same but this time will know better before he does something he has no business.
    mommatime78

    Answer by mommatime78 at 6:17 PM on Feb. 19, 2009

  • Oh, yeah. Been there, done that. I always feel horrible, too, but sometimes they just push you too far. Especially when you know they know exactly what they did. Don't beat yourself up about it, though! We all have our "mommy's lost it moments"...if we didn't, then there would be something wrong with us!
    beadingmom17

    Answer by beadingmom17 at 6:33 PM on Feb. 19, 2009

  • Honey, you are not a bad Mother nor are you the first Mommy to snap at your child. As long as you explained to him why you snapped and hugged him like crazy (which I know you did) it's going to be okay. It probably bothered you more than him. I have done this myself and I beat myself up for a long time about how the kiddos must veiw me. In reality, you are his Mommy, he loves you unconditionally and I'm sure will harbor no ill feelings torward you. We are human sweetie and things like this happen. Don't worry yourself about it. I know how you feel. So do all the other Mommies on here.
    happyathomemum

    Answer by happyathomemum at 6:34 PM on Feb. 19, 2009

  • Oh I think we all have. You're not a horrible mom. You are human!
    ColleenF30

    Answer by ColleenF30 at 6:35 PM on Feb. 19, 2009

  • 1. Yes I have.
    2. Totally normal. You are NOT a bad person or mother, you are human and shyt happens.
    BonesDragonDew

    Answer by BonesDragonDew at 7:02 PM on Feb. 19, 2009

  • Oh please....heeheehee.

    I have learned to grit my teeth and tell them to leave the room before I become extremely angry. They now know what that means...and they scatter. I do what I need to calm down...then we talk. If it's something they should have known better...they stand in the corner until I calm down. They don't like it when that happens...it tends to take longer for me to calm down. rofl
    TiccledBlue

    Answer by TiccledBlue at 7:04 PM on Feb. 19, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.