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10 month old hitting, bitting what should i do?

I have a 10 month old little boy he hitting me or bitting me when i tell him no or i put him in this play pen. i am 37 weeks pregnant and i am scared he is going to hit her.. i really need help, oh and he laughs at me when i slap his hands or i raise my voice a lil..

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AndriaRaeane

Asked by AndriaRaeane at 1:54 AM on Nov. 10, 2013 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 2 (5 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • Be very consistent as to what is, and is not, allowed. Stay calm and be matter of fact....no anger. At this age you need to distract with an appropriate activity and keep his environment totally safe. You need to be with him all the time. Lots of babies hate being restricted to a playpen or gated area. Others accept it with no problem. Make sure you cuddle and nurture him often. Let him "help" with thngs like folding the clothes no matter what mess he makes with the items you let him have. Constantly make him feel special and loved, especially when the new baby comes. And when the new baby does come you need to model appropraite loving behavior. Again, no anger, stay calm. GL
    silverthreads

    Answer by silverthreads at 8:18 AM on Nov. 10, 2013

  • Keep yourself safe (hold his hands when he starts hitting, so he can't, or move in a way that protects you from the bite & then hold him so he can't bite) but focus on showing & communicating understanding for the feelings he has that are driving the behavior. Raising your voice sternly or slapping his hands doesn't convey any understanding for him; it conveys disapproval & rejection. Of course your hope is to discourage the behavior. But you are dealing with a human being who is "acting out" his emotions. If you focus solely on the problematic behavior, you are making no space for the feelings & basically communicating that you (his caring mom) go away when he is "bad" (angry, frustrated) & no longer love or approve of him. The anxiety/anger this triggers only compounds what the baby already is feeling.
    Show him that it makes sense for him to be upset when he's told no, or put somewhere he doesn't want to be. Let him express
    girlwithC

    Answer by girlwithC at 8:34 AM on Nov. 10, 2013

  • those feelings emotionally (being angry--at 10 months, that means screaming, showing HOW upset he is!!) and he will have less reason to HAVE to "act them out" aggressively. If you make showing upsets (screaming & crying) unacceptable, what is left for him? The feelings aren't going anywhere! What we as parents need to provide is understanding FOR the feelings & guidance for communicating them. So do prevent him from hitting/hurting, and from behaviors like scratching, pinching, biting, hair-pulling. But show warm understanding for how he is feeling when he behaves that way (rather than responding negatively.) The physical limit (prevention) is enough, combined with caring understanding.
    You can expect that he will have feelings about the new baby. And it's not reasonable to expect much in terms of verbal expression or impulse control. Keep this in mind so that you're less likely to respond in anger to what he can't help. Take
    girlwithC

    Answer by girlwithC at 8:35 AM on Nov. 10, 2013

  • responsibility for keeping them BOTH safe, and do your best to be proactive & prevent opportunities. Let him show YOU his upset feelings so he has less need to "show" them to the baby. And forgive yourself when/if you didn't get there fast enough, so you can respond constructively in the moment.
    Focus on ways to respond with caring & understanding for his "negative" feelings however they get expressed (even when it's through aggression), so that he is getting emotional support & has less need to be aggressive. A big part of this is supporting yourself for your own feelings, so THEY don't get "acted out" in ways that reinforce the cycle you're fearing.
    Try to see your little guy as a baby, so that you're able to relate to him in warm, loving, accepting ways even when you're upset. That's what's likely to support & guide him as he grows, rather than contributing to a load of challenging feelings to carry(like grief, loss, rage.)
    girlwithC

    Answer by girlwithC at 8:39 AM on Nov. 10, 2013

  • Wow!! you really need to set the tone amd show ur ten month old whose boss. Use POSITIVE LANGUAGE and take a parenting class because it would not hurt. Instead of No, say Gentle. Or instead of Stop It!, say his name look him in the eye and TELL HIM WHAT YOU WANT HIM TO DO INSTEAD OF WHAT YOU DONT WANT HIM TO DO
    lullaby572

    Answer by lullaby572 at 1:41 PM on Nov. 10, 2013

  • Every time he hits or bites say gentle gentle and stroke his skin softly. Be consistent he will learn in a few weeks time. Trust me. Im an infant teacher. It has worked on over 40kids ive worked with with the exception of one, whose father was a ufc fighter. Hm I wonder where he learned all his moves? avoid fighting and violence on tv while ten month old is in the room. Even football. Children learn from this and do as they see
    lullaby572

    Answer by lullaby572 at 1:45 PM on Nov. 10, 2013

  • Congrats btw on the pregnancy:)
    lullaby572

    Answer by lullaby572 at 1:46 PM on Nov. 10, 2013

  • the baby is playing with you.
    christina122952

    Answer by christina122952 at 5:15 PM on Dec. 1, 2013

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