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What do i do if i don't want a divorce? should i bring that up during mediation?

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Asked by 4Hope4thebest at 7:08 PM on Nov. 12, 2013 in Relationships

Level 1 (2 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • If your DH does not want to stay married to you. You can not do much about it. Even with out you signing the papers he can divorce you. I think it takes longer, but he still can.

    Why would you want to stay married to someone who doesn't want you?

    Answer by louise2 at 7:10 PM on Nov. 12, 2013

  • You an bring it up
    But it will. to matter
    Mediation is not therapy
    If his mind is set, then it will happen

    Sorry, stay strong and plan a new future

    Answer by fiatpax at 7:38 PM on Nov. 12, 2013

  • What happened was i wwas very sick and over weight. I didnt do anything to help, then i had surgery and lost alot of weight, and started getting my life together. He did everything and got tired of it. He always tried to push me and beg me to help myself and i didnt. I have two baby boys and want more than anything to be a family again. He doesn't trust me, but im trying my best to make him see im changed. =/

    Comment by 4Hope4thebest (original poster) at 7:53 PM on Nov. 12, 2013

  • What do you mean he doesn't trust you?? What sickness did you have before?

    Answer by birdie313 at 8:00 PM on Nov. 12, 2013

  • he sounds like a jerk. but if you really want to make it work, fight for it. make him go to therapy with you. tell him you wont sign anything until you try couples therapy for 3 months. like once a week for three months. what happened to "in sickness and in health"?

    Answer by birdie313 at 8:03 PM on Nov. 12, 2013

  • what i mean is since i never did anything to betterr myself he doesn't believe i am doing anything to improve myself, and he feels if we were to get back together that i will go back to my same old self i was before. I was 555lbs now im 291 i was in and out of the hospital always sick. He took care of me and the boys. He became fed up and left me after the surgery. He saif he couldn't take it anymore that things would never change. And neither will i.

    Comment by 4Hope4thebest (original poster) at 8:05 PM on Nov. 12, 2013

  • Cheers to you for getting healthy again! keep droppin that weight girl! Maybe you need to shed him off your plate along with the weight. Maybe ask him to hold off on anything permanent for the time being. a separation period to let you prove to him that things are different now. that your different. you deserve a second chance at life. But if he wont agree to that, play the victim role and get as much money from him as possible in the divorce! This could really be the fresh start you need. A new you , a new life, a new man. they are out there! you deserve to be cherished and loved. unconditionally. keep your chin up and don't beg. be calm and let your voice be heard.

    Answer by birdie313 at 8:33 PM on Nov. 12, 2013

  • Certainly you should bring it up, but it takes two to maintain a marriage. He can get a divorce if that is what he wants regardless of your feelings. You have the same rights. No one can force you to remain married.

    Answer by Dardenella at 9:10 PM on Nov. 12, 2013

  • During mediation you may ask if he would consider marriage counseling with you.

    Answer by Dardenella at 9:12 PM on Nov. 12, 2013

  • You can ask. But I wouldn't expect much of him. I think the family's already dead beyond resurrection.

    Answer by gdiamante at 9:57 AM on Nov. 13, 2013

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