Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Wrong to sell clothes that others handed down to you?

My neighbor gave me a bunch of clothes for my son. I didn't ask her for them, she offered and it wasn't a case of "begging" online or anything for free stuff because I couldn't afford clothes.

She offered them to me and I said sure, as my son at the time could use some clothes and it saves me from having to buy clothes full price that he would outgrow in no time. lol

So she gave me some footed pjs that he wore for a while but outgrew, so I listed them online for a few bucks(nothing much). Was going to give him them money to put in his savings for a toy he wants.

She messaged me "if you are finished with the pjs can I have them for D***(her daughter)". I said sure of course but I don't think they will fit D as they still semi fit my son just not comfy and her daughter is not even 3 my son is 6. She answered "Oh ok"..

Nothing more lol

So what is the etique rule here? Is it ok to sell the clothes or what? She never asked me for any cash for the I wrong for selling them for a few bucks??

Answer Question

Asked by tntmom1027 at 12:25 PM on Nov. 13, 2013 in General Parenting

Level 27 (31,955 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • You shouldn't have profited from the clothes
    You should have passed them onto someone else,or donated them to charity

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 12:31 PM on Nov. 13, 2013

  • I'd just tell her you didn't realize she wanted them back so you already passed them along. To me, once something is given to you it's yours to do as you wish. Unless the giver asks to have them back at a later time, there is no reason not to pass them along in manner you seem fit

    Answer by Nimue930 at 12:33 PM on Nov. 13, 2013

  • If someone is taking clothes with the intention to only profit off of it, than it's not the best choice. But if they take the clothes cause they need it, than no longer have the need, than it is their choice to do what they want.

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 12:38 PM on Nov. 13, 2013

  • I do unless they specifically say they want it back when I'm done. My neighbor & I trade clothes. She gives me clothes for my Daughter & I give her clothes from my Son. I sell them after that. If I can't sell something & she can't use it (or someone else I know) then I donate it. Hey, that's my Christmas money for the kids toys! I'd give her the PJ's back since she asked but in the future ask her what she wants back when she gives them to you. Just say you have a friend that could use them. Most people just don't want to take the time & effort (which it takes) to resell. She would if she wanted to.

    Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 12:40 PM on Nov. 13, 2013

  • I would have given them back or gave them to a second hand store. If I don't purchase something myself, I consider it a gift. I do not make money off it. I even do that with shopping carts at Aldi. I will not profit from someone elses' generosity.

    Answer by m-avi at 12:41 PM on Nov. 13, 2013

  • I always asked. Do you want them back after he outgrows them or should I pass them on?
    If something is sentimental, don't give it away! You 'll never get it back!
    I kept all the baby things that were meaningful for me, and donated or sold the rest.

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 12:53 PM on Nov. 13, 2013

  • Once something is given to me, I feel that it's mine to do with as I wish. I don't really keep track of where every piece of my daughter's clothing came from. She's had a lot of stuff over the years, which I've donated here and there or tossed into yard sales as she's outgrown, so I can't really say for sure that I've never sold anything that was given to me. If I have, or even if I did it deliberately, I wouldn't lose any sleep over it. It's not like you deliberately begged for stuff because you couldn't afford clothes, then turned around and sold it for your own gain. If your neighbor wants the pajamas back, by all means give them to her. If not, sell them, and no guilt.

    Answer by Ballad at 1:04 PM on Nov. 13, 2013

  • i had rummage sale few weeks ago
    my best friend and neighbor did too
    she has handed me down clothing for my daughter
    i told her to shop my sale first and take all the clothes she ever gave me, because i can not tell difference what she handed down to my daughter and what i got elsewhere. she never did, she said she did not care. i was selling clothes for a buck each, just wanted stuff gone. less to bring to Goodwill.

    i did not accept hand me downs to make money from, daughter wore, she out grew and i offered to give back if she took all the stuff off my racks before the sale, she declined (rummage sales A LOT of work) she just did not have the time.

    i think, depends on situation
    i would not take hand me downs just to sell
    but also, if person gives to you with no " i want them back", kind of ballsy to ask for them back later on down the road (years later), people get rid of things all the time

    Answer by fiatpax at 1:20 PM on Nov. 13, 2013

  • fiatpax exactly....she gave them to me..she had gotten them from someone else and said she couldn't use all them or they were to small for her son. She never said anything about getting them back and her other child is a girl who is 3 yrs younger so I would never of thought she needed anything back for the girl.

    She also gave my son a pair of boots/shoes..then when it snowed(they weren't snow boots but those tan boot like things) she asked if she could borrow them for her son and she would return them after school..I said yes of course and my son pipped up....I would live them back I really like them! She hasn't returned them....I don't know why she gave them to me if they still fit her child and she wanted to keep them lol I don't care and my son has forgotten about them, but it still is a bit odd.

    Comment by tntmom1027 (original poster) at 1:27 PM on Nov. 13, 2013

  • No.


    Answer by cynzbryte at 3:18 PM on Nov. 13, 2013

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.