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When communication isn't there between you/ spouse what do you do to open up the lines??

We both get so busy with work, playing catch up on paying bills and all the things that take us away from each other at times. We have a good relationship, he is hard working and sometimes stresses of everyday get in the way of our connecting and communicating with each other. Any Advice for me on how to better situation and make communication happen easier and more often, would be appreciated. He is more extroverted. I am more introverted so I need to speak up/at times interrupt him to get my turn into the conversation. I hope this is something that occurs in relationships and there is a fix. Thanks!!

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:31 PM on Nov. 15, 2013 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • Touch and talk. Schedule it if you have to.
    PartyGalAnne

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 3:37 PM on Nov. 15, 2013

  • Do you need support for your actual communication, or do you just need to create the space & time TO communicate? (How is your communication, in other words?) Is this a logistical issue? Or more of a difficulty with communication?
    Are there any difficulties or issues that you feel the need to communicate about, but have not been able to do so successfully because the communication tends to break down or the process gets difficult?

    Sometimes, logistical difficulties (getting busy & not having any time for each other) can reflect avoidance if either partner is feeling psyched out by what you have to communicate, or feeling psyched out at the prospect of being able to reach resolution. Feeling hopeless can fuel a real disinclination to "go there."
    If you have a good relationship & communicate well, then I agree that scheduling the time & getting proactive about your "to do" list (so it doesn't take over) is a good idea.
    girlwithC

    Answer by girlwithC at 4:00 PM on Nov. 15, 2013

  • Show him your boobs then say what you need to say. Men suck at listening.
    staciandababy

    Answer by staciandababy at 7:54 PM on Nov. 15, 2013

  • Set an earlier bedtime for the kids. Have 15 -30 mins each night where it's just you and your husband to go over the events of the day and reconnect - no tv, no radio, just the two of you.
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 8:26 PM on Nov. 15, 2013

  • Set aside time with him without any distractions. Get a sitter for the kids, and go somewhere there won't be a lot of noise, and leave your phones on vibrate. Establish some ground rules at the beginning, too. If he tends to hog the conversation, tell him up front you want to be able to share your side, even if that means using a hand signal or pointing a fork at him that you want to get your say in. Also set the rule that you two will not interrupt each other.

    The important thing is to make the time for each other. Life is very busy, but marriage should be at or near the top of your priorities.

    Good luck.
    anng.atlanta

    Answer by anng.atlanta at 3:37 PM on Nov. 15, 2013

  • girlw.it is probably a little both a logistical and at times a difficulty in expressing myself/himself. We laugh a lot and talk with no difficulty mostly but when one or both of us is stressed we have little spats about the dumbest things. I think that is typical in most marriages.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 4:10 PM on Nov. 15, 2013

  • Plan a certain time and place to talk to each other. Every day or every week. You can do it more often but plan this time in as untouchable.
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 4:15 PM on Nov. 15, 2013

  • I think you should combine the advice of staci & missanc- while you have your boobs out, you will have his undivided attention! lol ;p
    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 10:46 AM on Nov. 16, 2013

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