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Will my bi-polar daughter every be independent?

Our 18 old daughter is bi-polar. She is very difficult to live with. I have her in therapy , on medication, and I feel as though I am begging her to let me help her. She is find it hard to stay on task..will she every be able to hold down a job?

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Asked by Anonymous at 7:56 PM on Feb. 19, 2009 in Adult Children (18+)

Answers (11)
  • I had a friend who's mother is bi-polar. She can hold down a job, but a job at like Taco Bell. She was always GREAT at her job, very friendly, hard working, but people picked on her and treated her badly. I think that for illnesses such as this, the right combination of medication is necessary and unfortunately it just takes time to find this. And she will also just need a great support system and it sounds like she has that in you. Just be patient with her, keep loving her and showing her you have faith in her. Pray for her and talk to her. If you ever need to chat or even vent, please send me a message.

    Answer by feesharose at 8:05 PM on Feb. 19, 2009

  • My sister is bi-polar. She's 30 and has a college degree from a Big 10 university and has worked for the same company for 8 years. She's on meds and manages fine, for the most part, at work. Her personal relationships suffer the most. She goes from one bad guy to the next. I worry so much about her, but she has the best heart in the world. She IS very needy and even though I live in another state, she calls me multiple times almost every day. It's exhausting, but I love her beyond words and don't mind listening to her rant and rave. At least when I hear from her I know she's alright. So to answer your question, it is possible for her to hold down a job, go to college, etc. My sister makes very good money, despite her mental issues.

    Answer by StarLee at 8:08 PM on Feb. 19, 2009

  • My Mom is bi-polar, unmedicated and not is a constant challenge and difficult to deal with! HOWEVER, one of my best friends is bi-polar, she graduated with a masters in art, she is married with two children, one child even has autism, she just started a part time job. The marriage has been strained at times, I see her struggle at times, she has had 2 episodes since I have known her (2 years), but she not only has to deal with her own bi-polar, she is raising an autistic child!! She does awesome for the most part, with medication and has been even incredibly better since she changed her diet (she went on the GFCF health style). When she starts to have an episode, she is now aware of it coming on and reaches out for help. She'll come over for tea and let the kids play and we cry, laugh and talk. She has a great support structure and I think that is important as well!


    Answer by blessed5x at 10:19 AM on Feb. 20, 2009

  • It depends on the person and the severity. yes there are people who are bipolar who are independent and successful but there are also those who don't. At 18 she's still dealing with the teen issues of wanting indepence and to be a grown up and not knowing how to handle it. If possible encourage her to stay in school, keep holding her to a standard, school and/or work, encourage her to try on her own, and consider therapy for yourself/family not just for her, b/c it affects all of you.
    I used to be all over the place for years (never diagnosed bi-polar but close to it) and it took MANY years but eventually I learned to recognize my own danger signs and what to do about it.
    If she'll be open to yoga, martial arts I'd recomend it as well.

    Answer by MamiJaAyla at 8:12 PM on Feb. 20, 2009

  • yes.. she will most likely be able to hold down a job.. if she is still having problems though, you may want to talk to her about switching medications.. especially if she is depressed.. Finding the right medications make a lot of the difference in cases where people have a more sever case of Bi-polar.

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 5:38 PM on Feb. 21, 2009

  • Some can. Some can't. A lot will depend on her & how much control she decides to take. My son is also bipolar/adhd so I understand your fear. Sometimes I think he'll do fine... others I worry. Will he be independent as quickly as my other children - I don't think so - but I think he'll do well in the end.

    Answer by awnryprincess at 12:14 AM on Feb. 22, 2009

  • yes she can be independent but not if you keep enabling her. Send her off to college. Let her live in a dorm and learn to live on her own. In a dorm she still has limits so it's not like she is out in the world all alone and totally vulnerable. She'll be held accountable for her actions and her behavior. Many colleges even have free therapy for students. It's an option. There is a lot of financial aid out there.

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:19 PM on Feb. 22, 2009

  • I had a boss that is bi-polar and she holds a position in mngmt and she has a normal life, and yes with the right meds and group support she will do fine.

    Answer by kittyhut at 9:19 AM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • Just because shes Bipolar doesnt mean she cant do anything for herself or live on her own. Help her get her own place. As long as she stays on her medication as shes supposed to and goes to therapy I think she will be fine. I mean i'd make it a point to find her a place kinda close to you so that you could check up on her very often! And If she doesnt have a job help her look in the paper or online for one. I wouldnt treat her like a child because of her disorder!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GL

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:07 AM on Mar. 1, 2009

  • If she is on medication and is still having problems, perhaps she isn't on the right medication.

    Answer by jessnpaulie1014 at 3:38 AM on Mar. 6, 2009

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