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Hmm... should i be flexible?

so my ex MIL dropped the kids off this morning (as per the court order) and i mentioned Thanksgiving. this year is their year to have them (sobs) so i asked her where i should bring them and brought up that the C/O says 12-5. she was like "well we have to figure out when and where because my brother works on T-day so it might be friday" i just said ok and left it at that. but the C/O doesn't say "or the day after, or whatever day is convenient for the family" it says Thanksgiving. i would only benefit from it if they waited til friday, because that way i'd get to celebrate it with them. im just sick and tired of them rearranging everything to their convenience when THEYRE the ones who pushed this stupid ass parenting plan. i guess what im getting at is- if they choose not to take them thursday, i dont HAVE to take them over there friday, saturday or wahtever day they decide to celebrate thanksgiving, and they have given me no reason to be anything less than strict and bitchy about following the C/O.

Answer Question

Asked by tnm786 at 12:24 PM on Nov. 25, 2013 in Relationships

Level 43 (159,608 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • I would just let it go. This way maybe you'll get them every Thanksgiving since it's always on a Thursday. I'd just sit tight & quiet & hope I had my kids for that day. If you act too eager or angry it may blow it. Then I'd let them see their dad on Friday.

    Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 12:29 PM on Nov. 25, 2013

  • Personally I would be flexible if it meant I could spend thanksgiving with my kids. If you push it and tell them you aren't bringing the kids over on another day, I imagine they would then take Thursday. And as much as I hate my ex and think he's a negative influence, his family isn't all bad and I wish my kids got to spend them more.

    Answer by missanc at 12:32 PM on Nov. 25, 2013

  • ^^ I agree. Let them tell you they can't take her Thursday and document it.

    Answer by DJDNY at 12:33 PM on Nov. 25, 2013

  • oh i wouldn't tell them beforehand lol

    Comment by tnm786 (original poster) at 12:34 PM on Nov. 25, 2013

  • I would let it go but, document. Especially since you want to have them on Thurs.

    Answer by 3libras at 12:39 PM on Nov. 25, 2013

  • If the kids are old enough to know and hear the family talk then keeping them Friday just to piss off the family is wrong. DO NOT use your children as pawns in a game against your ex or his family. It only ends up hurting the kids in the end. If she does come back and say Friday instead document it and if you didn't already make plans for Friday then let them have the kids.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:45 PM on Nov. 25, 2013

  • just to piss the family off? clearly you didn't read a word i wrote anon.

    Comment by tnm786 (original poster) at 12:50 PM on Nov. 25, 2013

  • I would stick to the court order, which is thanksgiving day. They've been nothing but assholes to you about all of it anyway. THEY wanted things this way just to piss you off (I'm guessing). Well, two can play that game. Follow the court order to a T, if they don't like it, TOUGH. If it's not in the court order, then it doesn't happen.

    And a huge hug to you and your girls, I can only guess how hard this is for all of you.

    Answer by Rosehawk at 12:56 PM on Nov. 25, 2013

  • As long as it benefit you let it slide. Like the other said. Document it. Be strict when it doesn't.

    Answer by louise2 at 1:12 PM on Nov. 25, 2013

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