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How many of you were friends with your husband before you dated?

I see a lot of advice about being friends before getting into a relationship, and I know that it's good advice, I've done that....but to be honest, my husband and I weren't friends first. We fell madly in love with each other almost from the moment we met, and after 25 years of marriage, I think we're even more in love.

How about you guys? Friends first or love at first sight?


Asked by ohwrite at 12:53 PM on Nov. 25, 2013 in Relationships

Level 32 (55,771 Credits)
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Answers (21)
  • but to be honest, my husband and I weren't friends first. We fell madly in love with each other almost from the moment we met, and after 25 years of marriage, I think we're even more in love.

    Did you steal my life?  LOL

    You just described me and my dh and we've been married 25 years.


    Answer by beeky at 10:25 PM on Nov. 25, 2013

  • We were friends before we started dating and I really think it adds so much to our relationship. My ex and I were not friends first and that relationship was very different. My girlfriends were much more important when I was married to my ex because I needed that outlet so much more. Now although I retain my friendship with the girls, my husband also provides that function for me very well. I don't think that being friends first means you will last forever, but I think you can be sexually compatible and "in lust" with someone that you don't actually like much or have much in common with. That doesn't bode well for a lasting relationship.

    Answer by missanc at 1:15 PM on Nov. 25, 2013

  • We weren't friends first but we did start out casually dating. Neither of us expected or were looking for anything serious but within just a couple months we clicked so well that everything else fell off and we pretty much spent every free minute together. As they say, the rest is history.

    I think being friends first CAN help but 1) You're either interested in dating or you're not. Nobody is going to "wait to be friends" for x-amount of months/years if they are already interested in dating and 2) Being friends with someone can help you get to know them, but won't tell you what they're like to actually date.

    Answer by maecntpntz219 at 1:22 PM on Nov. 25, 2013

  • Can't say we where. We only knew each other maybe 4 months before we married. But we are good friends now. I believe you should be best friends when married.

    Answer by louise2 at 1:14 PM on Nov. 25, 2013

  • Hmmm?? Well. we met in H.S. & dated. I dumped him. Then he went to Military School & I decided I really liked him! I asked his friend to have him call me not expecting to ever get a call. Dated 9 years & married after we finished College. Married 21 years now! So I guess we were friends first.


    Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 1:22 PM on Nov. 25, 2013

  • We were co workers, and friendly with each other, but not really close... We worked for the same company but in different parts of the state, and saw each other at trainings, meetings, etc. then it went to Facebook chatting, emails, then phone calls..... :)

    Answer by Nimue930 at 1:25 PM on Nov. 25, 2013

  • Well we were friends for a year before we married lol but we fell in love the minute we met one another so BOTH :)

    Answer by luvmygrandgirl at 1:26 PM on Nov. 25, 2013

  • We were friends first. We were both in other relationships, and hung out as couples.

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 1:49 PM on Nov. 25, 2013

  • we were friends first for about 5 years. the marriage didn't work out, so i dont think successful marriages have anything to do with whether or not the couple was friends first.

    Answer by tnm786 at 12:55 PM on Nov. 25, 2013

  • We were not really friends. We were in high school when we met and both secretly liked each other. We hung out with totally different crowds. We would say hi to each other and chat when we saw the other, but never were "friends". After I graduated, he asked me out and then it was an instant kind of thing. But friends first?.. not really.

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 12:56 PM on Nov. 25, 2013

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