I'm sorry this is a whiny, bitching, "woe is me" post. I swear to you ladies I'm not the type of person who always feels sorry for herself. I've just reached a horrible breaking point and can't seem to claw myself out of this shit.
I don't want to bore you all with all the details...just the basics. I feel like no one cares, no one is on my side, blah blah. And I dont want to do it anymore. I'm working my ass off to catch up because of dumb ass decisions my husband made, just to have him make more decisions to put us behind again. In fairness, he's working his ass off too. But I'm so angry at him for putting us into this mess, and now I have to clean it up.
My baby doesn't sleep well at all, so I get almost no sleep, and DH, nor the other kids, give a shit. When I'm home, I'm on the constant run cleaning and cooking and being mom, while he gets to sit around and do nothing.
Then I'm up all night with the baby.
Then I get HIS attitude every morning! Like I've done something terrible every freaking morning! Oh, yeah, I forgot! I don't spread eagle every night and beg him to treat me like a porn star! God forbid! And when I do give him some, he wakes the baby and guess who's stuck sleeping on the couch earlier than most nights? I am...NO NOT HIM! I sleep on the couch with a kicking, pushing, screaming 1 year old!
And now I'm sick. A couple weeks ago everyone in the house got some stomach bug. Everyone but me. So I spent 10 days straight cleaning up puke from one of the other members of my family. When he was sick, I was Nurse Mom. Cleaning cooking, AND keeping him comfy and kids quiet so he could rest, etc. The everything cleared up. And a few days later, I got a head cold. Not stomach, head. I feel like complete SHIT! I've had it for about 3 days. I shouldnt be at work. I shouldnt be around the kids. I should be in bed. But I'm STILL the one up with the baby all night, then the first one out of bed (couch) in the morning to get kids on the school bus, then cleaning the house before I get my allotted 20 minutes each morning in which I'm allowed to shower and get dressed for work. All the while having kids under my feet, a husband screaming at me for whatever wind blew up his ass this time. So I can go to work to try to slowly clean up HIS mess while he goes blowing money that I'm not allowed to bitch about!
I want to give up on all of it. The disrespect from him, which has just filtered to my kids...they show me no respect, or compassion, or care at all, has just gotten to a point that I want to give up. As long as they have clean clothes on their back, and dinner in their stomach, no one in my house gives one rats ass as to what I need! I need some freaking sleep!! I need to give my body some rest to fight off a stupid head cold that should have been long gone by now, but isnt because I'm getting no sleep and running my ass into the ground from 6:30am-11pm every.single.day. But none of them even stop to see any of it. Even when I point it out to them. I've cried...it doesnt matter. Then I'm just "feeling sorry for myself". I've gotten angry and throw things (not around the kids, and nothing serious. A pillow once, and a basket of laundry the other time). Which just makes me crazy (that I agree with). And I cant get through to any of them that I CANT TAKE ANYMORE!
What the hell do I do? How do I get him too see me, and stop taking me for granted? Cause if he starts caring about me, and appreciating me, and showing it...I know the kids would too.
(I guess I did get into the details...I'm sorry)
Asked by Anonymous at 4:47 PM on Nov. 26, 2013 in Relationships
Answer by 2kids2dogs2cats at 4:50 PM on Nov. 26, 2013
Answer by anime_mom619 at 4:55 PM on Nov. 26, 2013
Answer by anime_mom619 at 5:02 PM on Nov. 26, 2013
Answer by louise2 at 5:04 PM on Nov. 26, 2013
Answer by 2kids2dogs2cats at 5:23 PM on Nov. 26, 2013
Answer by Ballad at 5:31 PM on Nov. 26, 2013
Answer by Ballad at 5:35 PM on Nov. 26, 2013
Answer by girlwithC at 5:44 PM on Nov. 26, 2013