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Need christian advice and or prayers.( teen issues)

::prayinghard:: Sorry if this gets long. @ years ago my oldest daughter waited till she was a senior in highschool to start rebelling,lying ect. She turned 18 a few months before graduating then moved in with her boyfriend and his mother. She dropped out of school and finished online. It broke my heart. It wasnt what I had planned for her. Fast forward my second daughter now 18 and a senior in highschool flipped out on me today for pretty much nothing. She told me our relationship is dead and that I just dont care about her and I overreact oh and I am the B word. I tried to stay calm and told her to give me her phone she said you cant have my fing phone. She has never before talked to me like this. She stuck the phone down her shirt and I tried to get it she said she would call the police if I touched her. This stems from a few months ago I started limiting her contact with a young man who basically treated her like crap. I realize she is almost an adult. This is just heart breaking and it feels like history is repeating itself. She says she dosent want to live here anymore. Umm I dont know where to send her. What in the world do I do she turns 18 in January. Please any advice or prayers would be welcome.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:12 PM on Nov. 29, 2013 in Religion & Beliefs

This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • You do not have to take the phone away. Just call the phone company you go with and tell them to shut her phone off. When she turns 18. She can move in with her sister. That is what I would tell her. Tell then your house your rules. Just start limiting the stuff you give her and do for her. If she does not have a job yet. Tell her to go get one.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 9:51 PM on Nov. 29, 2013

  • What do YOU own in these relationships that are making them go sour right when your kids turn 18? What is YOUR part in this conflict?

    Yes, teens will rebel if they feel over controlled, and not heard. From what you posted here, there's more to the story. People don't just flip 180 like you describe in BOTH your daughters unless there is a reason behind it. That does not include people with medically diagnosed mental problems.
    Rosehawk

    Answer by Rosehawk at 9:25 PM on Nov. 29, 2013

  • There seems to be a lot missing from this story
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 9:33 PM on Nov. 29, 2013

  • You sound very controlling... that never ends well with high school age kids!! Why is your relationship with your daughters so toxic to them?
    Crafty26

    Answer by Crafty26 at 9:57 PM on Nov. 29, 2013

  • This age is so hard, and it's especially hard if you're a parent with rules, so many kids don't have rules, or at least their parents don't seem to enforce them. You love your daughters and want the best for them.

    I agree with louise2, your house-your rules. Good luck Mama.
    ohwrite

    Answer by ohwrite at 10:48 PM on Nov. 29, 2013

  • Maybe family counseling? You can make her go until she turns 18. Maybe by then you will be able to work thru your issues. At least your oldest finished HS, even if it was online, she still got her diploma. GL
    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 9:28 PM on Nov. 29, 2013

  • I don't think the problem is being strict. I think the problem is geography. You're living in an area where their behavior is what's expected. So they're living up to expectations.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 10:23 PM on Nov. 29, 2013

  • My oldest now 20 says that it want anything I did really she just had hormones and made enough money that she felt grown and didn't want to have rules she now says that being grown up inst what she thought it would be. In our rural area its the norm to get married or shack up right after high school. My girls know I want them to go to college. The 2nd one wants to go but she also wants to be able to come and go as she chooses and not have any responsibilities while she is living here. In my opionion I havent been strict enough.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 10:09 PM on Nov. 29, 2013

  • Tell her when she starts paying half your house bills. She can have all the freedom she want. Even though she will have freedom she still would have to help clean. Because that is what adults do. Clean up their own messes.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 8:39 AM on Nov. 30, 2013

  • I don't know.. as an adult she should have more freedom to come and go as she pleases. Your house your rules, but if she has a key she should be able to come and go as needed. You can charge her rent if you like or tell her to go live with her sister. You are within your rights to kick her out. Let her call the police. They won't do anything. She has YOUR phone. you pay for it. I would have the company cut off the phone. She can turn it back on when she is paying for the bill. Bottom line if she wants to be treated like an adult then do it. Let her see that it's not all it's cracked up to be like her sister. She has to mature a bit more anyway.
    2autisticsmom

    Answer by 2autisticsmom at 5:00 PM on Nov. 30, 2013

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