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Cheated

Have you ever stayed with your significant other after they cheated on you? Are women considered to be stupid when they take back a man that has cheated on them?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:26 PM on Dec. 7, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (13)
  • No, I would not stay. Never had that happen though.

    No I would NEVER take the scum bag back. END.OF.STORY.
    m-avi

    Answer by m-avi at 12:27 PM on Dec. 7, 2013

  • No, but I have never learned that my SO cheated on me. I don't know if I would stay with him or not. I would like to say no, but these things are more complicated than they sound. It might depend on whether I caught him or if he admitted it outright and expressed regret and was willing to get marriage counseling. I would be willing to go to counseling, but I don't know if I could stay with a man that I don't trust even if I loved him more than anything in my life. I would want my kids to learn that it's not okay to treat someone that way and I wouldn't want them to think that I don't respect myself enough to stand up for what is right.


    Regardless, I would demand on counseling at the very least before I could make a decision to take someone back or not.

    QuinnMae

    Answer by QuinnMae at 12:29 PM on Dec. 7, 2013

  • No and I would say it depends on each relationship
    jem102675

    Answer by jem102675 at 12:32 PM on Dec. 7, 2013

  • i did with husband (ex husband)
    he cheated i forgave, he did it again

    i will not do that again
    fiatpax

    Answer by fiatpax at 12:38 PM on Dec. 7, 2013

  • No I am pretty sure I would not. That is breaking my trust in him in a very significant way. There would have to be extraordinary circumstances, like he thought I was dead for us to get past that.
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 12:39 PM on Dec. 7, 2013

  • no to both
    christina122952

    Answer by christina122952 at 2:14 PM on Dec. 7, 2013

  • No, and I think it depends on the situation. Most of the time I think it's not smart to take the guy back, but under some circumstances, might be okay.
    ohwrite

    Answer by ohwrite at 2:16 PM on Dec. 7, 2013

  • I have never experienced that. However, I have friends who have left after infidelity, friends who have stayed, and friends who initially stayed or tried to work it out but the relationship ended. (One friend in that last situation now is considering getting back together with her ex, though not convinced that she is going to do so. It has been a couple of years for them; they have been co-parenting & both have learned/grown a lot.)

    I think every relationship is different (even though some dynamics are common) and I do not automatically consider a woman "stupid" for staying in a relationship after discovering their partner's infidelity.

    I think the prognosis can vary widely for people (marriages) in that situation. I think the biggest variable is the approach or the kind of support they do/don't get, both as a couple processing the issue & as individuals understanding the underlying issues with cheating, and how to change.
    girlwithC

    Answer by girlwithC at 3:05 PM on Dec. 7, 2013

  • Nope- that's a deal breaker. Once trust is gone, it's hard to get it back. I would constantly be wondering if he's being truthful about where he's going & who he's with. Not to mention the animosity I'd have toward him. I personally couldn't do it.
    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 4:31 PM on Dec. 7, 2013

  • I would never stay with a cheater, and yes, I think any woman that takes a man back after he cheats IS stupid. That's like allowing it, in my book. He'll do it again because he got away with it the first time. If he knows he has nothing to lose, he has no fear.
    PartyGalAnne

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 3:00 AM on Dec. 8, 2013

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