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I want to leave my marriage. My husband is bipolar ,I believe, won't get meds

Has fits,throw things,puts holes in walls etc. I am 30 years putting up with this. Would I get half his pension if we divorce. Also does he have to pay alimony? How do I start?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:44 AM on Dec. 16, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (14)
  • Contact a lawyer
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 8:53 AM on Dec. 16, 2013

  • You start by picking up the phone and calling a divorce attorney.
    KTElite

    Answer by KTElite at 9:03 AM on Dec. 16, 2013

  • Yep, you need a lawyer. Every state has different laws.
    ohwrite

    Answer by ohwrite at 9:15 AM on Dec. 16, 2013

  • ^^yep. Divorce attorney is your first stop. Different states have different laws regarding spousal support and division of property. Much depends on specifics of your relationship and what you brought into your marriage with you, as well as what was acquired after you got married.
    QuinnMae

    Answer by QuinnMae at 9:22 AM on Dec. 16, 2013

  • Call your local bar assoc. for a referral to see a divorce attorney. GL
    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 9:47 AM on Dec. 16, 2013

  • It all depends on what the judge rules. But you'd be better off in the poorhouse without him than WITH him and having money.

    I can tell you that my MIL got only a settlement in her 25-year marriage. No alimony, just half the pension.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 10:03 AM on Dec. 16, 2013

  • You usually have to be married many years to qualify for part of your husband's pension. And alimony laws vary from state to state.

    But, living with a mentally ill person who refuses to seek help is very difficult. And raising children in that environment is potentially damaging to them, too. You have to protect the children.
    May-20

    Answer by May-20 at 10:28 AM on Dec. 16, 2013

  • Forget the money. You pick up the phone and find yourself someplace to live and walk out.
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 11:42 AM on Dec. 16, 2013

  • First of all... you can't TELL anyone with a mental illness that they HAVE a mental illness. They have to come to that conclusion through their own realizations or through a doctor. Trust me on this one - you tell a crazy person that they're crazy, and they WILL go crazy. It's like telling an alcoholic who doesn't know they're an alcohlic that they drink too much - you're just going to start a fight.

    Have you tried to work it out at all, aside from just telling the poor guy that he's crazy and needs medication?

    Whatever you do, good luck to you both.
    AdensMama0308

    Answer by AdensMama0308 at 12:27 PM on Dec. 16, 2013

  • Document everything. Find a place to go and leave. Then call a lawyer.
    PartyGalAnne

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 3:17 PM on Dec. 16, 2013

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