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I created a problem

Met up with a former bf and I wanted to talk first and hope to clear up some questions I had. I was kinda resentful that he just wanted to hang out at his house and watch a movie. To me that read he just wanted sex and because of that impression had I didn't ask any questions...whats the point if he just wants that, right? The sex wasn't mind blowing like I wanted it to be and just went off on him (said some truthful but male ego busting things). 6-7 months later I still miss him. Still have random dreams of him, still want to kiss him. I know it's about getting back out there and exploring new things..I .still think of him. He respected me and didn't hold my past against me.Saying sorry won't help this situation so what do I do withthese feelings? Do the dreams mean anything?


Asked by Anonymous at 8:24 AM on Dec. 31, 2013 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • I'm with Nanny B. You say he respected you, but if he only wants to get together for sex, that isn't respect. But to be honest, you didn't show much respect for yourself. Why would you meet up with a former boyfriend and let him have sex with you in the first place?

    If you want to find a good healthy relationship, you need to get yourself healthy first. This guy is not the answer.

    Good Luck mama, you deserve better.

    Answer by ohwrite at 8:59 AM on Dec. 31, 2013

  • A lot of people get nostalgic around the holidays. Maybe you just don't want to be alone for New Years. I say if it's been that long, you can ignore the dreams (they're probably nothing) & keep looking ahead. It doesn't sound like you had a solid foundation to begin with & not even "mind blowing" sex. Use the new year to look ahead instead of backward & put this guy out of your head.

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 8:30 AM on Dec. 31, 2013

  • Your definition of respect must be a little skewed. It seems to be more that your past he used against you, and that is disrespect. Feeling follow thoughts, so force yourself to think of something else when you are tempted to think about him. If you must daydream, make up an ideal and refuse to think about a user. Never again let yourself be suckered like you were by this dude.

    Answer by NannyB. at 8:51 AM on Dec. 31, 2013

  • Find someone who doesn't just use you.

    Answer by Bmat at 9:15 AM on Dec. 31, 2013

  • "He respected me "

    Oh, no he didn't.....


    Answer by m-avi at 10:55 AM on Dec. 31, 2013

  • You got booty-called silly. If you want to talk, do it at a restaurant or over coffee in a public place.

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 1:38 PM on Dec. 31, 2013

  • Start over with someone you don't share a past with. That's what I'd do. Less complicated that way.

    Answer by Ballad at 2:01 PM on Dec. 31, 2013

  • Wow I kinda felt like he was using me. Thanks for the honesty gals :]
    When I have daydreams I can remember what y'all said he didn't respect me.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 9:34 AM on Dec. 31, 2013

  • He said he respected me (slaps self in face as I write it because I was a dope). Smh I have to better now and work on me.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:47 PM on Dec. 31, 2013