Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

is it ok

im mad at the inlaws about some major things. would it be wise of me to email them and tell them how i feel instead of confronting them face to face. that does nothing but causes fights when i speak up. i dont want them around until they treat me with respect. so is emailing them the appropriate thing to do?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 6:55 PM on Feb. 20, 2009 in Just for Fun

Answers (7)
  • I would run it by your husband first. At least make sure he is behind you since they are his parents. An email is a bit informal. Why not write an actual letter and snail mail it? It will be less likely to get a quick, emotional fireback type of reply that way.

    Answer by MamaChamp at 6:58 PM on Feb. 20, 2009

  • i believe communication is the best thing. if u feel like u wont be able to express urself freely in person then the email should be ok. but i do think that u will need to tlk face to face at some point when all parties are level headed. if it is that bad thou, u may even want to go to counseling. hope this helps

    Answer by Phippsandrea at 7:00 PM on Feb. 20, 2009

  • No, don't do it. Never put anything in writing. Email or snail mail carries a much heavier weight than the spoken word. See them face to face and say it, then it is over except for the fact that it has been said. Having it in email or snail mail means they read if over and over and can hold against you what was said in the heat of anger.
    Even better, if you can, say it all to your husband and get it out. Then decide if you can stand not saying it to his parents. I'm afraid that a written message would be seen as weakness- hiding behind something written instead of saying it to their faces. If you tell them and they get nasty, you walk out.

    Answer by Bmat at 7:15 PM on Feb. 20, 2009

  • You're husband needs to be heavily involved in this. There is a time in a man's life when he is to leave the parents and cleave to his wife. You need to discuss all your thoughts and feelings about this with him, and because they are his parents, he needs to defend you to them. He needs to explain to them that he will not tolerate their inconsideration or disrespect to his wife. Then you both needs to step back and let the chips fall where they may. No mail or email....he needs to have a conversation with them. He needs to be a man and confront them about their treatment of you.

    Answer by EireLass at 7:17 PM on Feb. 20, 2009

  • Odds are good either way, there will be trouble and "poor me's" tossed about by them.

    When I had issues with my mother I told her over the phone even though I desperately wanted to email her LOL. Since face to face wasnt possible, phone call it was. It was voice to voice which is the next best thing to face to face.

    Id call and air it over the phone.

    Answer by BonesDragonDew at 7:20 PM on Feb. 20, 2009

  • Why isn't your husband dealing with this? They are HIS parents HE needs to be the one who deals with it.

    Answer by hautemama83 at 7:52 PM on Feb. 20, 2009

  • Not sure when this question was asked , but I do believe that if face to face will not work then a good old fashion snail mail letter is your best second choice.

    Answer by GardenClub at 11:48 PM on Feb. 20, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.