Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

my lesbian mother dissaproves of my husband

because he is a man. what do I do about her, him, and the dislike she has for him. getting rid of the man is not going to happen because I love him, he is my child's father and a good one at that.


Asked by Anonymous at 8:29 PM on Feb. 20, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • Preaching to the choir sister! My mom is also a lesbian and cannot stand my husband of 12 years! If he doesn't do something her way, he's doing it wrong. She will actively put herself into a health crisis by overworking herself in the garden or yard or around the house rather than accept help from my husband. Now, if I was offering help, she'd take it. But not him! And she is always (ALWAYS!) dissing him (when he's not around). She makes it seem like he isn't even capable of tying his own shoes! I am so fed up. ARGH! I love my mom but she needs to lay off (she is also well into her 60's) and let us help and stop putting down my man all the time. I feel your pain! I know what you are going through. I wish I had some help to offer. GOOD LUCK!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:10 PM on Feb. 20, 2009

  • well if you have it good for yourself which it seems, she's just going to have to get used to him being with you and in your life.

    Answer by americansugar80 at 8:32 PM on Feb. 20, 2009

  • tell her if she loves you then she will accept your husband. that sounds harsh but im sure you are old enough that she cant choose who you are going to spend your life with. tell her to get over it

    Answer by SThompson21 at 8:32 PM on Feb. 20, 2009

  • Well, has your mother stated that her disapproval is because he's a man, or are you speculating?

    Answer by .Peaches. at 8:36 PM on Feb. 20, 2009

  • she flat out told me she doesn't like men, all of them are asses, mine included.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:37 PM on Feb. 20, 2009

  • I think when people think that way its because they have been hurt in the past. Maybe tell your mom that you understand that while she is a lesbian (by choice or birth, it doesn't matter), that is not who you are. And also point out that she is behaving in a discriminating way towards your husband. As someone who belongs to a group that is discriminated against often, she should be more sensitive to sterotyping people (even Also let her know that you do not have to explain your reasons for being with a man, and that you can not let her intolerance for you husband affect your child. If she continues to berate your husband and refuses to be civil, then she is a bigot and you should limit your family's contact with her. Its tough b/c shes your mom, but hatred is hatred and should not be tolerated.

    Answer by ozarkgirl3 at 9:09 PM on Feb. 20, 2009

  • Inform her that she is giving lesbians a bad name. She should be happy that you have a good man. You are married, and have a child. They are your family. She is your mom, but they are your family. They come first, espeically given her behavior.

    Answer by Buffie95 at 9:14 PM on Feb. 20, 2009

  • definitely giving a lesbians a bad name, if i were a lesbian and my daughter met a nice man or woman i wouldnt care as long as they arent mean to her and treat her right

    Answer by aliciatron at 9:54 PM on Feb. 20, 2009

  • All lesbians aren't man haters. Tell your mom to keep her feelings to herself and respect your choices as you've been stuck respecting hers.

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 9:57 PM on Feb. 20, 2009

  • She's just maybe jealous of your life.Maybe she changed her lifestyle b/c of a man or men hurting her.She should be very happy for you and think of her grandchild she will hurt by hurting you and belittling your husband.Sounds very selfish to me.Husband comes first.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:27 PM on Feb. 20, 2009