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How can I forget my ex boyfriend?

I was 22 and now I am 35 I am married with 3 girls and I feel like I married my husband without loving him I keep thinking of my ex but I dont know If I should look for him and just talk to him because we left eachother pending over some girl that was my friend she got prego after she knew I got prego from him but did not have it and she did but she is no longer my friend and no longer with him anymore what do I do? LOok for him or just let it go I am upset at my husband and I really would like to run to my ex to see if he will caress me like before.....because my husband is a cold person he doesn't care for my feelings.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:58 AM on Feb. 23, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • uhhh.. 3 kids later... You need to make a decision with their best interest at heart. In other words is it worth risking your marriage/family to find someone that it did NOT work out with anyway? IMO if things were meant to work out, they would have. You are "romanticising" the ex relationship because you are seeking more in your present relationship. Try to work on your marriage, exhaust every option and then if it doesn't work.. start thinking of alternatives. .other than that sorry but "grow up!" Life is hard, relationships are hard!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:27 AM on Feb. 23, 2009

  • It is normal to feel like you want to run somewhere else from time to time. The fantasy connection with your ex is normal too. Especially considering the fact that you were pregnant and you were younger. This is what I like to call "what if" angst. You are probably under a lot of stress and the natural thing to want to do is to be comforted. Ask yourself...would running to your ex really comfort you in the long run? Would it really lessen your stress? What about your kids? What about their stress and comfort? My advice to you is to relax. Don't let daily things get to you so much. Comfort yourself. Curl up with a hot mug of cocoa or tea and a good Anne Tyler novel.... I recommend "Ladder of Years."
    FlyMom07

    Answer by FlyMom07 at 3:31 AM on Feb. 23, 2009

  • start dating someone new.
    kimaam

    Answer by kimaam at 4:09 AM on Feb. 23, 2009

  • oh I didn't read the rest, now that I see that you have all those kids with your husband then you should tell him how you feel and that will probably make him be less cold with you and caress you like you want...and try not to think about your ex.
    kimaam

    Answer by kimaam at 4:12 AM on Feb. 23, 2009

  • if u have 3 kids then you really got caressed lol!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:13 AM on Feb. 23, 2009

  • I wouldn't. You'd be making a huge mistake. Why is it that you blame this friend for getting pregnant by your exboyfriend but you don't blame him for getting her there? If he knocked up your friend then he doesn't really sound like much of a prize. Why not try working on the current relationship you are in? You'll be happier in the long run if you just fix the life you have now and stop wishing it away. So will your children.
    beckcorc

    Answer by beckcorc at 7:19 AM on Feb. 23, 2009

  • you need to talk to all of them you have mess with all of them.
    madcat500

    Answer by madcat500 at 8:52 AM on Feb. 23, 2009

  • The grass in not always greener on the other side. Too often you will find its the same grass after all.
    isabellalecour

    Answer by isabellalecour at 9:28 AM on Feb. 23, 2009

  • Write your ex a LENGTHY letter--say everything you wanted to say but were afraid to, weren't sure of, whatever is on your mind...get it off your chest....

    THEN

    DESTROY IT...don't mail it....DESTROY IT! And along with it, "bury" all of the feeling you have, or you THINK you have about your ex. Exes are exes for a reason!

    Next, FOCUS on your husband. Really try to figure out at which point your husband became "cold." There has to be a time when you were attracted to him, loved him, thought he was wonderful--enough so to want to marry him and have three children with him. When did that change...did either of you change? Why?

    Now discuss those issues openly and honestly--when the kids are asleep or not around to interrupt you. If either or both of you can't or are unwilling, then you should see a marriage counselor to help mediate your discussion. If that won't work, then you probably need to consider divorce.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:13 AM on Feb. 23, 2009

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