I think he is too hard on the kids. Sometimes he will treat me as if I am one of the kids as well. Telling me what I need to do etc.... I didn't think he was being fair one night and told him that both of the kids needed to help take the trash out, he favors the 13 yr old and that especially since the 13 yr old had just lied to us. When he told me not to question his authority. But then if I step back and stay out of things he will tell me I don't discipline and thats why they are like they are. I think they are just reacting to how he is, he calls them names, degrades them etc... and then when they rebel he gets upset and mad. I told him they learn that from him, that he is suppose to be the role model but it doesn't seem to matter. I don't know how to get thru to him but I am tired of the screaming yelling name calling etc..... HELPAnswer Question
Answer by angelwings63050 at 10:35 AM on Feb. 23, 2009
Answer by Zakysmommy at 10:35 AM on Feb. 23, 2009
Answer by hannahwill at 10:44 AM on Feb. 23, 2009
Answer by KARRIEMARIE at 11:02 AM on Feb. 23, 2009
OH Men are such a wondrous thing aren't they?! LOL Really, sometimes you have to teach your man like you teach your children! My heart goes out to you! Here is my suggestion....men do not respond to anything they construe as nagging, they do not respond to negativity - pointing fingers, they do respond to respect (often undeserving of it), ego stroking, and positive reinforcement. I would plan a date night, just the two of you, make it a positive atmosphere. Your hubby doesn't know proper conflict resolution nor how to fight fair. Start by telling him how much you love him, how you honor your marriage vows to him, how you appreciate all the times when he does (you fill in the blank), then say I have deep concerns that we aren't in sync with discipline of the children and we need to come up with a plan that both of us can agree on for the children. (continued)...
Answer by blessed5x at 11:23 AM on Feb. 23, 2009
(continued).....let him know how important it is to teach by example, come up with a House Rules plan with your hubby and violations will result in whatever punishment you both deem appropriate. In the House Rules make sure that it is included that no one is to demean, call names or raise their voices at one another, that each one is to treat the other as they themselves want to be treated. This includes the parents! Violations are .... (you fill it in). Let him know that a "fresh new plan of action" is necessary for respect, honor and peace in the home. That way boundaries are set, clear rules and chores are set, and no one is confused as to what duties and what behaviors are tolerated / intolerable....! Let him know that you are his helpmate, not his child and want to help him with his role as the authority figure in the home. Let him know how you feel in a loving and admiring way, this appeals to a man's (continued).
Answer by blessed5x at 11:29 AM on Feb. 23, 2009
Answer by blessed5x at 11:34 AM on Feb. 23, 2009
Answer by mommatime78 at 11:53 AM on Feb. 23, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 1:47 PM on Feb. 23, 2009
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3 days till my surgery and my world is falling apart....