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Would you have a baby for a friend who can't?

We have friends that are 1) great parents 2) desperately wanting to adopt a little girl. My husband and I have six children already, would you have a baby or be a surrogate for your friends? Two of our kids and their son are half siblings so we'll always be in contact and be able to see how she would be doing. We have decided to do it and are very excited as they are, but I want to know how many of you ladies would do the same.


Asked by Anonymous at 1:21 PM on Feb. 23, 2009 in Adoption

This question is closed.
Answers (18)
  • I would be able to do it in the scenario you described. I was going to do it for my best friend, but she died. I would need to be able to see the baby as much as I would see my nieces or nephew. I would want to be part of the baby's life as an auntie. I would not be able to do for a stranger. I would always wonder what was going on witht the baby.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:02 PM on Feb. 23, 2009

  • i would be a surrogate yes

    Answer by aliciatron at 1:21 PM on Feb. 23, 2009

  • As much as I would want to, I don't think I could. I would be too hard for me not to get attached.

    Answer by musikdoll at 1:23 PM on Feb. 23, 2009

  • No. I hate pregnancy way too much to do that.

    Answer by StarLee at 1:32 PM on Feb. 23, 2009

  • First, you can't guarantee them a girl, what happens if it is a boy? I've read it is very expensive & takes a lot to be a surrogate. I think it's even more trouble if you just have a baby & give it to them, what if you get attached? In my opinion, I think it would be better for them to go through an agency & adopt or adopt through foster care. This is very personal & intense stuff to put on a friendship. If you are serious, I would do a lot of research on being a surrogate, I hope everything works out!

    Answer by Christian-Mom79 at 1:39 PM on Feb. 23, 2009

  • There are lots of variables involved. How would you feel if after you had the baby & it was "theirs", they decide that contact with you & your family is too much for them? Or would you really really be able to keep your opinions to yourself if you saw them raising her in a way you didnt agree with? I can imagine this really might go in an opposite direction & put a real strain on what is right now a good friendship. ANd like someone mentioned already, what if you got pregnant with a boy? Would you continue the pregnancy?

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:02 PM on Feb. 23, 2009

  • I think they should adopt. So many kids in this world are waiting for loving parents. I would not.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:38 PM on Feb. 23, 2009

  • i have one friend who i would do this for, i would do anything for depends on your friendship, but ask yourself if you would truly be able to handle all the negatives involved....and personally, i think it's great that you are able and willing to do this

    Answer by at 2:43 PM on Feb. 23, 2009

  • I have a very close, dear friend that I would do this for in a heartbeat if I were able to!

    Answer by MommyAddie at 3:21 PM on Feb. 23, 2009

  • No. I wouldn't. I've heard too many surrogacy stories where the surrogate thinks the couple loves her and would never shut her out, and then the baby comes and they can't handle it and do shut her out.

    Answer by onethentwins at 3:39 PM on Feb. 23, 2009