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Why are my kids this way?

Where did I go wrong? My ds14 my dd12 they both have a dumb way of communicating with me. I'll ask them how was your day at school? They say good.
Then that is it no conversation or anything. And if I ask anymore questions they act like I'm wanting to see proof on what they did or they'll just say oh mom I don't feel like talking (and that's all the time) unless something is on their mind then they talk...ugh.
I ask them to do stuff around the house and they act like they don't have a clue they're always mopeing around as if their life is boring. My dd12. shows more love when she wants something. I do not like the way they are or act towards me. What can I do different.
I swear if there were some kind of boot amp for them I'll sign them
Venting...thanks ladies!

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:28 PM on Apr. 19, 2016 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (6)
  • Um, normal teens. Get used to it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:38 PM on Apr. 19, 2016

  • Kids need to be told that a family takes care of a home and tasks around the home together. Everyone has responsibiluties. Have a family meeting and present a task/chore chart. The kids take turns doing what is on the chart. Do not overload them. Be fair. No privileges or tech time if the tasks are not done. Write down your tasks too.

    One idea to foster conversation is to have them tell you one bad thing and one good thing that happened to them that day when you all have dinner together. Discuss things not pepper them with questions. And you might have a game night every two weeks or so. Plus plan one on one time for each child with each adult in the home weekly or at least bi-weekly. So very important as they get older. GL


    Answer by silverthreads at 10:49 PM on Apr. 19, 2016

  • Both the ladies above nailed it. You're not doing anything wrong. And to be honest, don't expect a complete conversation with your kids for, oh, the next 8-10 years! :-) This is normal teenaged stuff.

    We do the things silverthreads suggests, but that gets conversations of about two paragraphs in this house. Two SHORT paragraphs, at that. Sort of like these two paragraphs!

    Answer by gdiamante at 2:19 AM on Apr. 20, 2016

  • They don't need boot camp but learning to have better conversations with parents is good. 😊

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 8:42 AM on Apr. 20, 2016

  • All of that sounded like normal teen behavior to me, TBH.

    They don't want to do their chores, that's why they act like they don't understand them. Shoot, I'm a grown adult and I don't like doing housework either. Your daughter sucking up to get stuff...that was my M.O. growing up. She does it because it works, if not on you, then it works on her father. And, not opening up, that may seem troubling but, if they really needed help, they'd come to you.

    Answer by RoboBuddy at 9:08 AM on Apr. 20, 2016

  • Normal. All of it. Do this. When you ask them to do stuff. And they don't want to do it. When they come to you about something they really want to do or you to buy. Tell them to go clean the bathroom or what ever chore that need to be done. Before you give or do something for them.

    Answer by louise2 at 1:22 PM on Apr. 20, 2016

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