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help with my 8 year old stepdaughter

Well i have a 8 year old stepdaughter she is now living with us since the beginning of the school year. At first it was really hard because she was mean to me and to my little daughter who is 3 years old. She used to tell me that i am not her mom to tell her what to do and she did not listen to me at all. I am the one that take care of both of them because my husband works almost the whole day. But now she is better but sometimes i dont understand her because she has mood changes she calls me mom during the week and weekends she goes with her mom and when she comes back she calls me by my name. I will like an advice so i could understand her and to help her overcome everything that comes later in her life.

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Asked by jessyx21 at 9:16 PM on Feb. 23, 2009 in General Parenting

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Answers (3)
  • she needs continuity, she shouldn't ever be calling you mom. it's ok to call you be your name- its her level of respect and affection that is important. keep your authority and your caring and with time your actions will speak for you.

    Answer by teri4lance at 9:34 PM on Feb. 23, 2009

  • My step daughter will be 7 Friday she lives with us and I have been raising her since she was 17 months old. She calls me moma because its what she is comfortable with Bo one told her to age just started it but she distinguishes between her biological mom and myself biological mom she calls mommy message me and we will talk

    Answer by HomemakinMommy at 9:50 PM on Feb. 23, 2009

  • HMMM, The calling you mom thing is not quite appropriate if she is still very much involved with her actual mother. Calling you mom may even make her feel guilty when she see's her mother and could cause needless anxiety for her.Be firm but fair and parent her like any child should be parented, don't complicate your care with parental politics and try to teach this child how to be an extrodinary young lady and use your heart to lead your lessons with love, but do not treat her any different than you would any other child in need of care, regardless if she is yours bilogically or not! You are raising a little girl and she wil learn from you if you let her know she can. PEACE

    Answer by mckct at 11:15 PM on Feb. 23, 2009

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