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Changing a childs last name.

I have a almost 7 year old son, who has my maiden name because I was not married when I had him. His father is a once a year dad when he comes home to visit his family. He doesnt regularly pay support. He never calls, and is basically what I call a dead beat dad. The man I am married to is who he calls daddy, this man was around ever since I was 4 months pregnant. He wants to adopt our son more than anything. But the one time I went to pick up his birth certificate they told me I could not change his last name with out a paternal test and then the father would have to give up his rights. Okay heres the thing though, there is no dad listed on the birth certificate because when he was born he wasnt there to sign it. So does any one have any advice on if it is possible to change his last name to my now married name. (his bio-father wont give him up, yet wont be in his life either)

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Asked by Anonymous at 9:40 AM on Feb. 24, 2009 in Adoption

Answers (11)
  • I would think,if there is no dad listed on the birth certificate,then ,you could change his name,but the bio father would have to himself,file for dna testing.There are some lawyers that will give a free consultation,so I would check with them first.good luck

    Answer by Val504 at 9:45 AM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • i can't be absolutely positive, but i'm pretty sure that even though biodad's name isn't listed, his rights still have to be relinquished for you to change the last name.

    Answer by BriasMommy_827 at 10:20 AM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • I don't know where you live, but I live in FL. When I got divorced, I took back my maiden name and changed my sons' last name to my maiden name as well. I had to have my ex-husband sign a form, I can't remember the exact name of it, but it basically said that he was giving his permission for my children's last name to be changed. It didn't change his child support or change any of his rights, just allowed me to change my kids last names. So, I don't know if your son's father would agree to it, but that might be one way to get it done. Otherwise, I think you might need a lawyer to figure out how to handle it, with him not being on the birth cert. Good luck!

    Answer by tropicalmama at 10:32 AM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • I had to do something similar for my oldest child, when he was born I wasn't married and gave him my maiden name. I eventually married his father (who was not listed on the birth certificate). All I did was call Vital Statistics - told them the situtation and just had to send a letter stating why I was changing the last name and provide a copy of a doctor receipt, insurance card or school record that reflected the new last name. Didn't cost me anything but the cost of the new birthcertificate and a couple stamps. Call your vital statics office and ask them how to best handle it...I found them really helpful.

    Answer by blessedwboysx3 at 4:34 PM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • Sorry hun but his daddy still has rights you'll have to test the father and then he'll have to be willing to sign over his rights

    Answer by aubrees_mommie at 5:33 PM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • Changing a last name (or first name for that matter) and changing the parental relationship to a child can be two separate things. Often in this section on "adoption" the two occur together as part of an adoption. However, you can do a legal name change without changing the parental rights of the parent who's name you no longer want to list. They may have to be informed (and in some states agree) to the name change but it doesn't have to change the parental rights which can be the sticking point. If it means that much to your son then talk to the two dads in his life and see if they would be on board with it.

    Answer by PortAngeles1969 at 7:05 PM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • I just went through a similar process. Every state is different with the process, call an attorney and they can walk you through the easiest way to get it done. My ex was a person who only made promises to my kids and I would have to break their hearts because he could not do what he promised! My attorney walked me through the entire process and everything was completed relatively quickly! Good luck to you on this matter, I hope all goes well for you!

    Answer by shandebar at 1:19 PM on Feb. 25, 2009

  • Well you could say you don't know who the father is.....

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:56 PM on Feb. 25, 2009

  • Sure anon. LIE about it. then get screwed if the father pops up & wants to exercise his rights someday.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:11 PM on Feb. 25, 2009

  • If there is a biological Father even if he is not on the birth certificate, he HAS to sign over rights.

    Answer by happyathomemum at 4:58 PM on Feb. 25, 2009

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