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do you believe its true??

..that you cant spoil a baby before their a year old.

I believe we hold our daughter too much so when she screa,s for attentions sometimes i let her sit there.
My boyfriend does not agree with this he thinks she should have my full attention all the time or she'll have "trust issues" when shes older.

What your opinion?

Answer Question
 
lovencasper5307

Asked by lovencasper5307 at 3:49 PM on Feb. 24, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 1 (2 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • I would say you can't spoil them before six months, but after that they start to learn what bring attention. I think they can get spoiled then. JMO.
    kboney29

    Answer by kboney29 at 3:51 PM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • I agree with your boyfriend :-) And studies show he is right as well. Check out this latest study form Harvard http://www.hno.harvard.edu/gazette/1998/04.09/ChildrenNeedTou.html "But they say that parents are on the wrong track: physical contact and reassurance will make children more secure and better able to form adult relationships when they finally head out on their own." "Parents should feel free to sleep with their infant children, to keep their toddlers nearby, perhaps on a mattress in the same room, and to comfort a baby when it cries." "Parents should recognize that having their babies cry unnecessarily harms the baby permanently," Commons said. "It changes the nervous system so they're overly sensitive to future trauma."
    maggiemom2000

    Answer by maggiemom2000 at 3:52 PM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • I think that if a baby is crying there is something wrong with him/her. Check and see if they need to be a diper change, feeding, or if they are sick/ colic. I have 2 kids and my babys never cried unless they wanted something. so no i dont think that you can spoil them.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:56 PM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • I also agree with your boyfriend. Your baby should have your full attention. I would never just sit there when my baby is crying.
    Cassieniccole

    Answer by Cassieniccole at 4:09 PM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • your baby was in your for 9 months of course she gonna scream she still isnt familiar with the world clearly and needs YOU. She is scared when put down. How would you feel if your boyfriend took you to some strange place you were scared and he leaves you to cry you be VERY UPSET dont leave her there. If she is fine in your arms leave her! get a snuggly or something so your hands are free.
    Lauren2008

    Answer by Lauren2008 at 4:11 PM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • freud said that 0-1 was the trust v. mistrust crisis, when people learn to trust the world, or not, but yoyr kid, your choices
    gypsymama532

    Answer by gypsymama532 at 5:19 PM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • Okay, enough of the Harvard study already. It has some good points, like the ones about differences in cultural upbringing. But it's a study by two researchers looking to get published, and it's not even a new concept. Families in other cultures also sleep in the same room. So they aren't really more loving, they just don't want to hear it. I could go on (we all could, but let's not).

    You are a good mother, go with your instincts. You have to pee, you have to pee. If you decide you want/need your child to sleep through the night, just stay consistant (depending on how old your baby is). Start with a plan- like let them cry 10 minutes, go in, reassure them, and come back in 10 mintues. That's NOT neglectful.
    Don't let your boyfriend or anyone else make you feel bad about it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:23 PM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • yes you can!!!! i want every mom who says its impossible to spoil a baby to work in the infant room in a daycare for one day!! lol. I worked there (obviously) and you can spoil a baby! babies need your comfort of course, and they need to know that youll be there, but they dont need you every moment. you have to start right away with independence or you will never be able to put them down!! i can understand not letting them scream if they are genuinely upset about something, but when they scream theyre heads off for no reason, and the moment you touch them to pick them up they completely stop, thats spoiled. also when you go to put them down and before their butt even touches the floor theyre screaming, then you lift them up three inches they stop, yeah thats spoiled. so long story short lol you can spoil a baby!!
    Amanduhpanda

    Answer by Amanduhpanda at 5:37 PM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • see && thts exactly what shes doing i give my daughter what she needs and if she screaming her head off and wont stop i try everythin g there is to try and if she doesnt stop when i put her down i know its just that but i odnt think ima bad mom idc what tthey say i never asked who was right && who was wrnog outta me and my boyfriend i simply asked what everyones personal opion was [=
    lovencasper5307

    Answer by lovencasper5307 at 10:49 PM on Feb. 24, 2009

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