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Hubby doesn't want any more kids!

I have 2 perfect daughters, I would also like a son in the far future, My husband swears were not having any more kids, He tells me he can handle the ones we have! I don;t understand why he says that because he never has to do anything, I change all the diapers do all the baths make all the food and he is NEVER alone with them, He doesn't have to wake up with them either, Is it bad that I think he has no say, I don't understand why he is so against it if he doesn't have to do anything???????

Maybe because he's my husband I just can't understand his side? What do you ladies think, what do you think he may be feeling?

 
GJCJMomie

Asked by GJCJMomie at 5:07 PM on Feb. 24, 2009 in Relationships

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This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • Well, in all honesty - if you've done everything and he's done nothing for/with the kids and he's not even alone with them .... has he really bonded with them the way you have? What reason would he have to want another child if he hasn't bonded with the 2 you already have? I'm not being mean here, just trying to point out something that may not have occurred to you. My hubby does 80% of the child care when he's home from work (he's an over the road truck driver so he's only home at weekends) and I KNOW that their relationship has become closer as a result of him taking an active part.
    cat0325

    Answer by cat0325 at 5:32 PM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • some people just don't like kids even if they are his. i don't think your wrong to feel the way you do and it's to bad that he feels that way and you feel the way you do. i would of talked about what we expected from each other. as for me and my husband i told him i wanted a lot of kids and so did he. if it's in the far future then maybe just wait til then. he might change his mind then. after he sees the joys of parenting. maybe you should have him do some of the baby stuff so that he can bond to them. babies are hard to resist. i would just get pregnant. that is what i would do. although i know my husband would not leave me over it.
    melody77

    Answer by melody77 at 5:12 PM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • I know he wouldn't leave me or anything crazy like that but I don't want to be sneakie, I want me to get pregnanct because we want us too not because I want to.
    GJCJMomie

    Answer by GJCJMomie at 5:18 PM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • I am in the same situation as you are. I would like to have a boy someday, I already have two girls, and my DH neer does anything either. What job does your DH do? Because my DH said NO on another child and I think its just because he works alot he is not home alot and is hurt because he already can not spend enough time with the girls he already has. He tends to be more realistic then I am as well. Think about it, another baby will bring all kinds of added work for you on top of what you already do. Babies are great, don't get me wrong! But if you already have a full plate, a new addition would add to it. Plus, maybe the state of the economy is affecting his want on a baby as well? Talk to him and find out his real reasons, tell him you will not settle for anything less then a honest valid reason why NOT to have a new baby.
    BabyBeans0506

    Answer by BabyBeans0506 at 6:15 PM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • ask his point of view as to why he doesn't want another one, are you two living pay check to pay check as is ( as if no one isnt!, economy is screwed!!! ) he may be taking into consideration what more expenses there would be cause kids are quite spendy
    Breezy1988

    Answer by Breezy1988 at 6:26 PM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • A few things can make him feel like he doesn't want another kid...and since i don't know the full extent of your life, these are just guesses that i hoe are helpful
    1) Maybe hes afraid of more financial responsibilities (the economy sucks and if you guys are getting by now, maybe he doesn't want to "add" to the financial strains)
    2) If he doesn't do much with the girls, maybe he thinks another kid would put more responsibility on him; especially since the baby will need you and he'll have to start handling the girls on his own (even if thats not the case)
    3) He doesn't want a boy (or the possibility of a boy)..things that are familiar are comforting and maybe he would rather just deal with things the way they are...and not all men want boys, even if its a minority of them...
    4) He is worried about "middle child syndrome"...one of the girls would be displaced (in his mind...cause 2 kids=2 parents...it balances)
    ozarkgirl3

    Answer by ozarkgirl3 at 6:31 PM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • just because you want another one doesn't mean you have to have another one love the ones that you do have, and get on with your life. quit trying to force another child on him. geez!!!!!!!!!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:55 PM on Feb. 24, 2009

  • Thanks for the advice Ladies! Anonymous , I asked for everyones opinion so you didn;t have to block who you are lol! If your scared to make a point so people know who you are you shouldn;t make the point!
    GJCJMomie

    Answer by GJCJMomie at 11:30 AM on Feb. 25, 2009

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