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Kids at daycare in underware....what do you think of this?

We have two twin boys who just turned 3 last week. They were born VERY premature and are immature and rarely speak.

Their mother drops them at daycare Monday and says now that they are 3 she will no longer buy pullups. That they are too old for them.

Now they consitantly have accidents. Poop and pee.

She only packs them 2 pair of underware and we are having to dig into our extra cloths box.

Why would she do this????? They are obviously NOT ready to be fully potty trained and it is killing the teacher. She is only able to change wet or pooped cloths all day!!!!

What do you think, should the teacher just deal with it or should mom be told she cant do this?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:16 AM on Feb. 25, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (9)
  • I think that the daycare should set up a meeting with the mother and discuss potty training and get on the same page.

    This should always be done with potty training anyway.

    Wow, is the mom hoping that daycare will do all the potty training? Geez!

    Answer by girlneffy at 12:18 AM on Feb. 25, 2009

  • I agree with girlneffy completlety.

    Answer by jamesmommy12 at 12:21 AM on Feb. 25, 2009

  • Mom should be told it sounds like she wants you guys to do the dirty work not her. I would definatley have to tell her you need pullups instead of underwear I hope you throw those dirty underwears away there is noway you should be washing her stuff she should bring alot more underwear than 2. Or she should start bringing alot of pullups. Tell her it is so unsanitary not to mention it takes too much time to be with one child you plenty of kids to deal with already. Some people don't think sometimes you have to slap them afew times until they snap.

    Like huh! what did you say...oh ok I will start bringing whatever you need. No common sense on some people. GL Hang in there.


    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 12:23 AM on Feb. 25, 2009

  • She needs to hear that they need pull ups still.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:24 AM on Feb. 25, 2009

  • I don't like to judge people but I can say this with some certainty. She is either a.) hoping by some miracle the kids will get sick of crapping themselves and magically learn to potty train or b.) hoping all of you will get sick of the pee and poop and train the boys for her. It must be frustrating to have children that are learning slowly. If she's at her witts end, she might just be letting you do that little part of parenting for her.

    Honestly, I would tell her that potty-training can be enforced at school but ultimately needs to take place at home. Until they are fully potty-trained, they need to wear pull-ups or they cannot attend the daycare any more. Explain to her that cleaning up the mess is hazzardous to the other children because the boys are pooping and peeing in common and play areas and that it is taking time away from the other children to constantly clean it up. Good luck!

    Answer by NovemberLove at 12:24 AM on Feb. 25, 2009

  • What is the daycare policy on potty training? Do you help work with potty training? Do you leave it up to the parents and not work with the kids at the center?

    If the daycare policy is to work with the kids she is probably relying on the teacher to remind them to go to the potty and stay dry. If the daycare policy is to work with the kids, and she isn't sending enough clothes tell her she needs to send more. If she doesn't then put them in pullups anyway. (the preschool where my son attends keeps an emergency stash) and tell her she owes the center X number of pullups because she didn't send enough clothes/underwear.

    If the policy is NOT to work with the kids, tell her so...and tell her that until they are potty trained she has to put them in pullups.

    One question that comes to mind...they aren't pooping or peeing any more in underwear than they would in is the teacher changing them more now than before?

    Answer by TiccledBlue at 6:08 AM on Feb. 25, 2009

  • when my kids were in daycare there was a policy that unless they were fully potty trained they could not be underwear but parents had to supple either pullups or diapers. If the rules wasn't followed the parents were reminded and eventually lost their daycare.

    Answer by pagirl71 at 8:00 AM on Feb. 25, 2009

  • If pull-ups are too expensive & with twins she has double costs, I agree, Why not just continue in diapers until they are ready to potty-train? Temporary solution, no doubt, but maybe less costly. She sounds frustrated, perhaps, or choosing to be oblivious to the fact that her 3 yr olds aren't potty-trained yet. Boys sometimes wait until later, and being premature can delay things. I'd have a meeting in order to see what her thinking is, "let her vent", let her know that you are willing to help her however you can, but at this point in order to continue to keep the kids, she will need to bring diapers. Do the boys have ANY desire to start potty-training?

    Answer by doodlebopfan at 8:14 AM on Feb. 25, 2009

  • In Ohio the law would force us to put them back in the toddler/infant room as they are not potty trained.

    Answer by salexander at 11:24 AM on Feb. 25, 2009

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