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Our daughter has a little friend my husband and I cannot stand!

Our daughter has a little friend that I hate to say, my husand and I cannot tolerate. She is obnoxious, rude, sneaky and she is only 5! Our daughter is younger than her and has started immitating this little girl's facial expressions and "catch phrases". We are pulling our hair out trying to make our daughter stop acting like this bad influence. Because of our relationship with the other family we cannot keep the girls from seeing eachother. Does anyone have any suggestions how to stop this negative influence on our sweet little girl?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:07 PM on Feb. 25, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (7)
  • Well you need to find a way to keep the kids away from each other. Stop letting them play together.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:08 PM on Feb. 25, 2009

  • I have had a similar situation and it's rough because she'll begin to wonder why she can't do such and such if the five year old can. Really, you need to try to avoid this other kid as much as possible. I finally had to chat with the parents and say "we really parent differently and when they get together my kids are stressed." It didn't totally work but my little guy ended up in the hospital due to rough play by the other kid and that is when I said ENOUGH. If you really are stuck, crack down on the five year old whenever she's in your home and talk to her parents and say that you've been lax for a while but really you and your husband don't support certain behaviors. Tell the other parents to crack down on both kids if the playdate is at their house and maybe they'll get the hint.
    jeanclaudia

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 9:57 PM on Feb. 25, 2009

  • Been there and done that. It has to be one of the most horrible positions to be in. BUT....you dont have to hurt their feelings or even let the friends know. If the girls want to play, just tell the other mom that you are having behavioral issues with your child and you are keeping her away from others until you get it under control. Thats. DOnt do what I did, I came right out and told the mother her child was acting horribly and I cant take it anymore, It is rude, mean, and sooo disrespectful. Yeah, we arent that great of friends anymore.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:13 PM on Feb. 25, 2009

  • i explain to everyone that comes to my house i have certain rules and i expect everyone to follow the rules or they don't come over and that's for kids and adults alike. Though with the kids i also try to obey the parents rules and so they normally have to be really good or they cant come over.
    ladyheather900

    Answer by ladyheather900 at 12:38 AM on Feb. 26, 2009

  • This has only just begun! Wait until they start school! It's a catch 22 in that you can basically tell them who they can and can not hang around, later on that won't work!! Here is what I have done with all five of my kids. We are dealing with this very thing with our 6 year old in Kindergarten....we talk everyday to teach them what good behavior and bad behavior is and that no matter what behavior another child is doing, you do what is right no matter what. Find those kids that have the same behavior as we teach you to have and avoid the kids whose behavior is opposite of yours. Teach your child how to be a leader, right now she is being a follower. Teach your child how to be the one that other kids want to be like with her good behavior. It is hard because sometimes kids can seek out those that have bad behavior. We told our 6 yo to tell this "friend" that he can't play with him anymore if he (continued)....
    blessed5x

    Answer by blessed5x at 1:09 AM on Feb. 26, 2009

  • (cont)....keeps getting him in trouble. He did and it worked. Teach your child to stick up for his beliefs.This particular boy gets his card pulled in class all of the time, even goes to red most days.So when my son would come home and act like this little boy I would call him this childs name, it would make my son so upset. He didn't want to be called his name because he gets in trouble all the time. I said, if you are going to act like him, I may as well call you his name. This stopped it in it's tracks!! My son immediately stopped this other boys bad behavior. It's a delicate thing, because when my oldest was about 11 I couldn't stand one friend she had and I told my daughter how I felt. She continued to be her friend, but I said, one day she'll ....! Well, she did exactly what I said and my daughter stopped being her friend, took about 5 years, but hey!!  My daughter ended up coming to me and saying (continued)...
    blessed5x

    Answer by blessed5x at 1:16 AM on Feb. 26, 2009

  • (continued)......those words we all love to hear "Mom you were right"!!!
    blessed5x

    Answer by blessed5x at 1:16 AM on Feb. 26, 2009

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