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i need help with custody questions

i am going through an awful custody battle and i just want what is best for the children without going through the courts any advice for me on handling this like grown ups when i feel i am the only one willing to try

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Asked by missingmykidz at 10:29 PM on Jun. 19, 2008 in Tweens (9-12)

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Answers (7)
  • Sometimes it's difficult but it's necessary to have the courts involved, expecially when you're the only one acting civil. Continue to be civil and get a mediator.. they will see who is working on it and who isn't.. Just whatever you do don't ever ever bad mouth your ex in front of your kids!! The rest will fall into place later.. hang in there Momma!!

    Answer by mars33me at 10:32 PM on Jun. 19, 2008

  • I have been there, just do the right thing, always put the kids first. Get a good lawyer, mediaters are only good in the most civil of seperations. I have full custody because the judge was able to see through my ex's lies and manipulations. Listen to your gut! Good luck.

    Answer by snugglebunney at 10:42 PM on Jun. 19, 2008

  • Sometimes your only choice is to go through the courts. Especially if your ex refuses to be reasonable. My SIL found that out the hard way, and almost lost her son because she didn't go through the courts.

    Answer by tinandril at 10:46 PM on Jun. 19, 2008

  • You best do it legally or you could really lose out. Don't play Mr. Nice Guy. Fight for what you want or you may not get it. I know someone who was sooo "NICE" she got a lawyer, he didn't. In court, he decided to finally talk to her, and got a measley $30 child support bill per month which he doesn't even pay.

    Answer by TXdanielly at 11:45 PM on Jun. 19, 2008

  • Oh one more thing, you have to document EVERYTHING. Document when your children's father does and says what, when he has he kids, when he visits, and the money you spend on food, clothing. Otherwise you have no proof...

    Answer by TXdanielly at 11:46 PM on Jun. 19, 2008

  • I'd like to invite you to a board that I own on this site relative to custody situations:

    Answer by sjmookie at 11:06 AM on Jun. 20, 2008

  • the court system sucks and its going to take a long time, but if you are the only real adult in the relationship, you have to do it. my grandmother didnt go through the courts years ago and her husband was fine with her having custody. He kidnapped my mom and her 3 sisters 2 years later. She was 7, and she lived with him until she was 15. My grandmother found them and had to kidnap them back, and then go to court.

    Answer by ChasesMommy0115 at 10:22 AM on Jun. 27, 2008

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