Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Would you let your husband go on vacation/to see his parents with the kids and not you (if your mother in law always talks bad about you)?

Should a spouse vacation with the kids and not you? If the intent is to see the inlaws and they won't let you go because you had marital problems last year?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:23 AM on Feb. 26, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (20)
  • Oooh I would love it if my hub took the kids to see his parents wtihout me. Dont' understand what the problem is
    Zakysmommy

    Answer by Zakysmommy at 9:28 AM on Feb. 26, 2009

  • No, I would not like that. Vacation is suppose to be a family thing and is not something you do every day. Why dont you go with him and try and sort out the trouble with his parents. I know how you feel, I also have a very difficult mother-in-law, but remember, it is not worth giving up your marriage for your in-laws. Tell your in-laws how you feel.
    Roxy222

    Answer by Roxy222 at 9:28 AM on Feb. 26, 2009

  • BUT also, your husband shouldn't allow his parents to talk bad about you either. I would be furious if I found out that my inlaws were bad mouthing me to my hub and he didn't stick up for me
    Zakysmommy

    Answer by Zakysmommy at 9:29 AM on Feb. 26, 2009

  • they said you can't visit or you decided you can't? 1. I see no problem with it and 2. even if they told me they didn't want to see me I would still go and enjoy vacation with my husband and children. they can get over it.
    ZaTa

    Answer by ZaTa at 9:29 AM on Feb. 26, 2009

  • Heck no I wouldn't allow it, my son doesn't go anywhere I can't go. If they talk bad about who's to say they aren't bad mouthing you in front of your children.
    trevsrockinmom

    Answer by trevsrockinmom at 9:33 AM on Feb. 26, 2009

  • The question is not clear. Who won't let you come? Husband or in-laws? If it's the in-laws who are drawing the lines, then your husband should tell them that if those are the rules, then nobody's coming. If the husband as drawn that line, you may have to let him go. Depending on the ages of the children, it may not be as much fun as any of them thinks, and it could be a lesson worth the learning. Then, too, you should think of what you could do for and by yourself with all that free time. It really would be a better vacation for you if he did take the children with him and leave you behind. Try to look at all the positives. They may far outweigh the negatives. You could just drop the old ball in hubby's lap and let him decide and then determine to be fine with his decision. Sometimes, you have to give people what they think they want.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 9:35 AM on Feb. 26, 2009

  • well there is a good part about it because that way u gt a break without ur kids and its not lyk he cn go see someone else but i wld also go wit him to to show the mother in law that yall are together and no one is going to come between yall but may be u cld go wit him (or not) hint hint, and show him u can trust him or u cn let him take u but dnt let the mother in law kno
    Ashley1031007

    Answer by Ashley1031007 at 10:00 AM on Feb. 26, 2009

  • On one hand, all that me time would be fabulous, but on the other hand, no...first of all, your husband should not allow his parents to treat you that way and by him agreeing to go it tells them its ok to treat you like poop. His allegiance is with you.
    gramsmom

    Answer by gramsmom at 10:02 AM on Feb. 26, 2009

  • yes. i didn't like my inlaws at all. they were always so rude and mean to me. he would go to his home with our child and i would go to my home with my child.
    mrsary

    Answer by mrsary at 10:03 AM on Feb. 26, 2009

  • i would go just to show the old battle ax that she didnt rule me or my family (that man belongs to you now...not her! so does thoses kids!) i wade right in there, smile, be sweet, hate every minute of it under my breath....but i would not stay at home...for the very reason that she wants you to stay at home...stand in there...thats YOUR family! you may have to share them, but you dont have to give them up!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:07 AM on Feb. 26, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN