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Need advice on how to deal with a child with adhd.

My 11 year old has adhd. Her father my ex refuses to allow her to have med. Doctors say she should have a little but won't give it to her unless he agrees. She is getting violent with siblings. I have tried everything from positive reinforcement to the reward system I don't know what to do. I can't send her to live with her father. please any and all suggestions would be appreciated. siblings are 6 and 7 years old.

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Asked by Anonymous at 9:44 PM on Feb. 26, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

Answers (6)
  • Take it to the courts. If it will help your daughter, then she needs it.

    Answer by Carebear38 at 6:01 PM on Mar. 1, 2009

  • Does she need it at his house? Maybe she only gets it at your house (evil grin.) Our little girl is on ritalin, and she only takes it in the morning, not in the afternoon. This is so she can concentrate at school. Maybe he would agree to that.

    Why does the doctor say her father needs to agree? This is his/her opinion, or is that a state law? If it is the law, I liked the idea of taking him to court over this. If it is not the law, try telling your doctor why you would like them to prescribe the medication.

    Answer by Trixiebelle2 at 1:01 AM on Feb. 28, 2009

  • Also, if it is 50/50 custody, the parent that the child resides with mainly is the one with the final say - that is how it is here in VA

    Answer by JMOW at 11:35 PM on Feb. 27, 2009

  • Bring him back to court show judge Dr.s notes and have him pay for the court expense. I also would let him have her for 3 weeks in the Summer and then let him say she doesn't need meds. I got my daughter on concerta 36mg last Spring and the wonders are tremendous. Great grades she made it to be a patrol, she is socially acceptable (not grabbing on people and pulling) I can't say enough about it no anxiety for her, no 'drug' look it is great

    Answer by JMOW at 11:32 PM on Feb. 27, 2009

  • hi i have an adhd, an add and a nephew with adhd. so i have a little experience in the subject. as for it being an adhd triat im not sure but adhd RARELY is found by itself. most adhd kids also have what are called comorbid diagnosis. like learning disabilities, ptsd, odd, bipolar etc. so i would be taking her back to a pscologist and have her reevaluated asap. as for meds who has the LEAGL custody? if it is 50\50 you may not have a say but if it is you.he cant stop you. you need to look at this like this : if it was diabetis would you withold insulin? if it it was cancer would you withold kemo? i left the decision up to my girl and she takes it daily and doesnt feel she can manage without it!! her case is severe and if you knew how hard it was to live constantly distracted you would know what to do. you are the mom do what you need to do and dad can get over it!! find another dr if you have to!

    Answer by allforthelove at 4:38 AM on Feb. 27, 2009

  • who has custody the majority of the time? that is the parent who gets to decide if she gets meds or not. also, is she in any form of behavourial therapy to deal with her adhd? and most importantly are you sure it's adhd, cuase i've got two boys who have adhd, one of whom is not getting any meds for it cuase of his epilepsy, and neither of them are violent. i'm not one hundred precent certain that is an adhd trait

    Answer by bi-polarmommy at 3:03 AM on Feb. 27, 2009

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