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why do 18 yr old step-son not want to listen to the wicked step mother but only when there dads not around?

i am so stressed step son has put him self on our couch and i hate it he dont like me but acts like he does when his dads around! i grounded him for the day today and not 5 minutes after it he walks down the road!

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Asked by momof11995 at 10:43 PM on Jun. 19, 2008 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 4 (31 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • You can't ground an 18 year old! They are an adult! You can however expect respect or kick his ass out the door. And if your hubby doesn't back you up; you can pack his stuff too and tell him to join his son!

    Answer by Strssdmom72 at 10:49 PM on Jun. 19, 2008

  • Unless he is breaking the law, you've got to back off. He is 18 for one. For another, you are not his mother. Just be nice from a distance, and he might come around.

    Answer by TXdanielly at 11:40 PM on Jun. 19, 2008

  • Well I have been the 18 year old step child before... I hated my mom's husband ( Well then he was still her boyfrend but they had been together since I was14). I hated that fact that my mom always gave his son more attention when I was younger than I got from her. She used to say I was over reacting.But my mom always choose her husband and his children over me. I was always alone at home while they went out or to florida for the week. Does that happen in your house...maybe that is why you step son doesnt like you

    Answer by jasiramommy at 12:27 AM on Jun. 20, 2008

  • If he's showing disrespect towards you, try talking to him about it like an adult. Yes he's only 18 and that's young, but still legally an adult. Has his father tried setting things straight and standing up for you, or have you even let him know how he acts when he's not around? Grounding him at 18 yrs old? Honestly, that's not going to work because he's an adult. Seriously, straight up tell him that if he wants to be treated like an adult, then learn respect, and if not.. he has to suffer consequences like any other adult.. like finding a home of his own and paying his own bills.

    Answer by jamie8506 at 12:30 AM on Jun. 20, 2008

  • your husband needs to lay down the law. the son is an adult and if he doesn't want to follow the rules of you and your husbands house he is old enough to get a job and find his own house. you need time for your relationship.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:35 AM on Jun. 20, 2008

  • I'd use the my house my rules policy.and if hubby didn't like it, well I guess we'd just have to fight it out between the two of us.All I can say is stand your ground.Hopefully your husband will back you up.

    Answer by evelynwest at 3:50 PM on Jun. 25, 2008

  • I agree hes an adult and cant be grounded but i did it to prove a point! hes obsessed with his parents getting back together and has been for almost 14 years! When i met his dad they were seperated for 7 years and his mom had another boyfriend, but he still mentions it all the time. I had set up some house rules for him and he said ok and one of the rules was to get a job by july 10th and give me 1/2 of what he makes to be put away for him to get a place! Well he found a job and has worked 2 weeks and i asked him for the money and he just walks away like he doesnt hear me which is what he does all the time! My husband is stuck on what too do because he doesnt know his son because his mom has filled his head with so much crap and wouldnt let him see them and now he is at a loss on what to do?My hubby agreed with the rules and asked his son about them and he said there fine!

    Answer by momof11995 at 1:47 PM on Jul. 15, 2008

  • He has talked to him about disrespecting me and hes fine when his dads around and then when dads at work he dont say 2 words to me and goes out all day! I dont leave him really the last vacation we took was 4 years ago and his son wasnt even talking to him he does that he threw a flowerpot at his fathers head 4 years ago and then stopped coming around and now when he needed a place to stay he came back and apoligized to his father and that was it.

    Answer by momof11995 at 1:50 PM on Jul. 15, 2008

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