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How Can I Cope With A New Relationship And Being A Mom??

My son is 3 yrs old and i havent been in a serious relatioship since before i was pregnant. i finally met someone that i am falling for very quickly but im having serious issues meshing me as a mom and me as a girlfriend. im so used to just being a mom, im lost on how to mix the two so im happy ,my son is happy and so is the man im dating. ive never done this and i feel so helpless. i feel like this should just fall into place and its not! i relly like him and i see this going places for sure, but im just lost and hurting !! ANY ADVISE ON HOW U DO IT OTHER DATING MAMAS?????

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AdrianzMommie

Asked by AdrianzMommie at 4:52 PM on Feb. 28, 2009 in Relationships

Level 11 (618 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • That's a very good question. It was tough for me at first too. I met a man who is the love of my life 2 years ago and we have an incredible relationship. I have a 13 year old daughter and after she adjusted to the whole idea - she adores my boyfriend too. You just have to give it time. There is no formula. It is not easy. But be patient with yourself and your child. It's a good test to see if your new boyfriend has the ability to adapt to your little family too. It is like having 2 lives that will eventually come together as one if this relationship is the right one. Just give it some time.
    kathyartist2007

    Answer by kathyartist2007 at 5:41 PM on Feb. 28, 2009

  • Yeah I realized with my boyfriend right now that dating before I had a baby and dating now are really different. I think the thing that I do most is that I make sure he understands that its me and my daughter not just me, but he loves my daughter and she loves him so much, but he is long distance right now but since your a mom you know theres enough love in your heart for both you just have to give it time to adjust itself in
    HollyRose

    Answer by HollyRose at 6:29 PM on Feb. 28, 2009

  • Make sure that your child always comes first. Make sure he knows it as well. Try to take things at a pace you're comfortable with. Meshing those 2 lives together (life as "mama" and life as "woman") isn't an instant thing. It's all trial and error at this point... you'll find a good balance but it may take awhile.
    alinker

    Answer by alinker at 7:20 PM on Feb. 28, 2009

  • just relax and enjoy what the man is offering you. He's not proposing. He just wants to date you. Take it one step at a time and then it can work itself out
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:00 PM on Feb. 28, 2009

  • Does he have kids? If not, you are sort of in the driver's seat so to speak. Your child must be first priority. If he can handle this, he'll deal with the unexpected cancellations due to sickness, no sitter, etc. If he cannot deal, he's the wrong man. Be yourself, have fun, but you really are in a place to dictate how this goes down. You are a parent first but love can work with that too. Take is slowly and be clear about what you want and your priorities.
    jeanclaudia

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 12:22 AM on Mar. 1, 2009

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