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Can I go to church like that?

I live in this place since almost 3 years, hardly know anybody besides my husband and my daughter. No family around. I'm not baptised and never went to church with my parents when I was little.
There are so many churches, so I had the idea that every sunday I "try" another one, until I find a place where I feel comfortable. I admit that at this point my main reason is to maybe make some friends. You know, nice people, less swearing. And most of all I'd like to do it for my daughter. Make it the week's highlight, so that she gets to know other kids and is not just around mommy and other grown ups.
So far so good but here's the deal: I believe. In a very quiet way, I'd say. It's more a feeling, beyond words. I don't like to talk about god or jezus or praise and sing and raise my arms during the service. (I like seeing people doing these things though because they are happy and fullfilled. That's good. -to be continued)


Asked by Anonymous at 4:09 PM on Mar. 1, 2009 in Religion & Beliefs

This question is closed.
Answers (19)
  • wow amazing responses. really sad.

    I never went to church to socialize but to grow in Christ. Not because I was messed up but because I loved Jesus . It is a matter of choice to go to church not to be a pew warmer , yes no one will judge you for that except God. He did not make us to just sit and do nothing but to honor and bless and worship Him. I am not surprised you would feel uncomfortable not singing and all that. That is common with those who have not accepted Christ as their Savior. It WILL make you uncomfortable because Satan HATES Worship! Do I expect you to understand that? No. Do I expect you to believe that? No. You will either come to that conclusion on your own or you won't . Last but not least.... No matter what you do God , Jesus and Holy Spirit will always LOVE you. That does not mean he will let you get away with it but He will still love you. :-)

    Answer by Shaneagle777 at 6:36 PM on Mar. 1, 2009

  • you can if you want, but if you are looking to socialize try the park or a mommy and me playgroup.

    Answer by 2autisticsmom at 4:11 PM on Mar. 1, 2009

  • I feel very uncomfortable during a service because I just can''t sing along with the others and feel totally out of place. Like I should not be there, I'm taking somebody elses seat. You go to church because of you want to belong to a community and not use it as a kind of day care, entertainment for your child. I find it impolite to just go there and dissapear again afterwards. People want to get to know you, but I just don't like talking. And when I check out a church and what their belives are (the bible is the true word of god, he sacrificed his son to save us, and no on) I read it and think "no ... no ... no" Can't agree.
    So what do I do? Does this sound a bit weird, or can you sense what it feels like. I'd really like to go there, it's a friendly place, but I feel such an alien when I'm there.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:16 PM on Mar. 1, 2009

  • any excuse will do when looking for one. I spent most of my life warming a pew. When I go I don't raise my hands or sing or praise or move about restlessly unless the spirit moves me or I have gas. No one will judge you if you don't follow the crowd. They are so busy doing their own thing they won't even notice you not doing stuff. You are not taking anyone else's place. They will bring in chairs if the pews get filled. God doesn't care why you go He just wants you to go. I think your idea is brilliant. Go to every one of them and check them out. The Bible says He will guide you. Let Him open the door for you. Go in. Sit a spell and move on to the next one. If you find one that you want to stay in then stay. If not, hit them all. I'd go on days they have pot luck. Yum! God even blesses the food. He doesn't mind. He has more. Just find your spiritual self.

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:24 PM on Mar. 1, 2009

  • I agree with the first response. Try taking her to the park. Or find some playdate groups. Go to your local library and figure out when the reading hours are. Go to your SS office and find out if the have a handout one groups to join. (our WIC office and first five shasta does that where i live). There are other ways to meet parents and children then to force yourself to something you are not comfortable with.

    Answer by outstandingLove at 4:29 PM on Mar. 1, 2009

  • Agreeing with other responses, it doesn't sound like you want to find a church but a social group. Your local family services might be able to refer you to some or find places or groups that pursue your interests (art, literature, hiking, etc.).

    Answer by nysa00 at 4:54 PM on Mar. 1, 2009

  • I have an alternate idea - concentrate on reading and studying the Bible first. The Bible is the bedrock of any Protestant or Catholic church you will attend.

    Going from church to church to church is assuming you will "get it" in one visit. I have not found that to be the case. There is not one perfect church for anyone - but you dig in, get invested, and bloom.

    It sounds like you may have issues with the basic tenets of Christianity - which is why I suggest reading the Bible.

    Answer by Wimsey at 4:56 PM on Mar. 1, 2009

  • Check out it's a great place to meet other moms and find play groups.

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 5:13 PM on Mar. 1, 2009

  • Church is a place where alot of messed-up folks gather to get better. Welcome!

    Answer by RidingPink at 5:26 PM on Mar. 1, 2009

  • You should go to a non-denom church, they never make you feel out of place or force you to do anything! I go to a non-denom church with my husband and I am not even Christian so imagine me there, but I feel confortable there and they dont bother me or force me to do anything. I dont e even sing along with the songs, I just listen and take it in. Its nice :)

    Answer by MaiasMommy619 at 8:06 PM on Mar. 1, 2009