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How do you define love?

Would you say that someone who lied to you the whole time you've been together about everything and has not tried to even stop when they see that their spouse and marriage is up in flames and has been warned. They also haze ZERO respect, could care less how their spouse feels, how much they are hurting their spouse, marriage and child. Has never even made an attempt to stop and only thinks about himself. Has admitted he doesn't care and that he doesn't feel bad for it, and I am puzzled at how you could hurt the supposed love of your life to they point where they feel destroyed/used/emotionally tormented and miserable and LOVE them..How do you define love?
I feel there is absolutely nothing there but a man who is going to pull me down in every single way possible. If you've ever read the bible (I'm not getting religious here) he kind of fits the description of how God describes the devil.

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Asked by Anonymous at 7:38 PM on Mar. 2, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • What I mean by that is the devil is described in the bible as something that wants to destroy you and HATES you and when you are in his grasp he will suck the life out of you, steal your happiness, cause you pain emotionally. He does everything imaginable to destroy you and your life and you..
    My husband does all of it and how could he love me when he sounds like how satan was described in the bible? Once again I am not getting religious just using this as an example of what hate stands for..

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:44 PM on Mar. 2, 2009

  • Love is a selfless desire to place another human being's needs (and sometimes wants if possible) above your own. It is wanting the best for that person in their life, even if that means you have to be apart. It is a desire for the person to be happy. For the other person to be the best that they can be. It is a desire to step back and let be. It is uplifting the other person instead of dragging them down or keeping them static.

    I don't know if ANY of that made sense ... but that's my definition.

    Answer by cat0325 at 7:48 PM on Mar. 2, 2009

  • It did make sense Cat0325.I was afraid mine wouldn't make sense.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:58 PM on Mar. 2, 2009

  • Love is an emotion of affection towards another person. We use the tell-tale signs of being in love or loving someone in order to display our inward feelings of love for the other person. One could say that someone who put you first and went out of their way to make you happy was showing to you their inward feelings of love towards you. You could also say that someone who does not make you happy and in fact makes your life miserabledoes not love you due to the evidence of his actions.  From your description, he is not displaying the signs of someone who loves someone else.  If he does love you, his actions are denying his purposive "feelings."  Different people show their love in different ways but what you described isn't any kind of love I've ever seen. 


    Answer by NovemberLove at 8:24 PM on Mar. 2, 2009

  • love does not hurt...i was in a marriage for eleven years..i thought it was love but i know now it was a couple of kids trying to figure out how to deal with our own issues let alone each other's messed up issues. it was me trying to prove i was worth love, even though the man treated me like i know what i had was NOT LOVE....what i have now with my boyfriend is doesn't hurt, it never disrespects me, it never leaves me feeling less tahn the woman i want to be. love is warn, selfless, caring respect....everything i've always thoguht it should be but never thought i'd get.
    i use to think when my husband and i fought that it was passion and it was because we loved each i realize i was with someone who didn't love himself..and dragged me so far down I STOPPED LOVING MYSELF.
    now i know exactly who i am, i know exactly who i want to be with, and i know it's exactly what i deserved the whole time.

    Answer by yomamaporter at 8:54 PM on Mar. 2, 2009

  • A pain in the ass that I don't need.

    Answer by salexander at 9:37 PM on Mar. 2, 2009

  • many times we perceive feelings as love. Sometimes obsession (control) is confused with love. There are many misconceptions as to what love is but I don't think it is anything negative or harmful. If your heart and spirit are bruised by this then it's probably no where near love. It's probably control and manipulation. I hope you find peace and true love some day bc this doesn't sound like it's what you thought it was going to be.

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:42 PM on Mar. 2, 2009

  • respect is love. respecting the flaws. respecting the desitions you make in life without reason to question them. two person agreement. never one sided. hmmm then I wake up.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:49 PM on Mar. 2, 2009

  • Well, if you're looking for the definition of love... I think the Bible puts that best too..... (not being religious.... just saying it's a good description).

    "Love is patient, love is kind, and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things."

    --Paul in I Corinthians 13:4-7


    Answer by PaceMyself at 10:04 PM on Mar. 2, 2009

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