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My 6-year old daughter saw an explicit sex scene on TV. What can I do for damage control?

We have TiVo and when I walked in the room she was rewinding it. I don't know how long she had watched or what, but I flipped out completely and started screaming and running for the remote. Needless to say she was too scared to answer any questions at the time. Now it's been a few hours and I feel the need to say something to her about it. What do I do? I feel like her innocence has been lost!

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LadyEb

Asked by LadyEb at 4:01 PM on Mar. 3, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 10 (446 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • Well, it is never to early to start having talks with her regarding sex and things of that nature. It should be an ongoing discussion, not just "the talk" that you give at some magical age, so I would take this opportunity to explain to her that this is what people do when they are married and in love, and that if anyone touches her like that she should let you know right away (or let another trusting adult know) and ask how she felt about what she saw.

    Good Luck!
    CarolynBarnett

    Answer by CarolynBarnett at 4:06 PM on Mar. 3, 2009

  • You need to apologize for freaking her out and screaming.

    Then do what CarolynBarnett said.

    Good luck!
    Wimsey

    Answer by Wimsey at 4:08 PM on Mar. 3, 2009

  • More damage was done from you freaking out than what she saw. Calm down and speak to her about it. My son walked in on us having some freaky sex. I was bound to the bed and my husband was spanking me with a whip. This was 1 in the morning and my son never gets up but he did this night. My husband got up calmly put on a robe and got our son to bed. The next day he asked what we were doing and explained at his level what we were doing. He said it was gross and then went on to play. He has not brought it up again. We have been talking to him about his body since he started asking about it. The sex talk should not be one talk it should be a series of them throught the childs life.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:14 PM on Mar. 3, 2009

  • I agree that you probably did more damage by freaking out and screaming. You need to talk to her calmly, explain what she saw and answer any questions. Like others said, the sex talk is an ongoing thing, not just a one time conversation.

    Good luck!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:31 PM on Mar. 3, 2009

  • I agree with the others. You did more damage by freaking out and screaming about it. Just talk to her and tell her what the other moms said. I've done had the talk with my daughter and I will be some more the older she gets.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:48 PM on Mar. 3, 2009

  • Thanks! I know that my reaction was damaging which is why I wanted to do some damage control. It was very early in the morning and the last thing I expected to see was that. Ive always been very protective of what the 2 of them see on TV so I was upset.

    That being said, I did talk to her. She told me that she didn't know what she was watching but had an idea that it was wrong. I told her it was something for grown-ups and asked if she had any questions to which she said no. I told her if she does, she can ask me anything and let her know she wasn't in any trouble.

    I do know that we must talk about stuff like this ongoing however I just felt it was too soon.
    Hopefully our talk satisfied her curiousity for now.
    LadyEb

    Answer by LadyEb at 10:14 PM on Mar. 3, 2009

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