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Is hanging with the ex's girlfriend ok?

I dated a guy 9 years ago loved him but my dad was having sex with his mom so we broke it off. After loosing contact 7 years ago we stumbled upon each other on myspace. We had only sent each other one or two msgs and his current girlfriend was being nosey and msg'd me.We hit it off we get along so well. I thought nothing of it... My soon to be husband sees diffrent. He says that its not "cool" and its weird. We have so much in common and get along so well on the computer and phone I have yet to go meet up with her. We are planning a play date for our kids. But this annoying little man keeps telling making snine remarks about it every tiem i mention it... So... my ? should i meet up and see how the friendship goes or jsut keep it a internet friendship?

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Asked by Anonymous at 1:52 PM on Mar. 4, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • i dont let my fiance talk to his ex's only one because she lended him money and he owes her but only to say hes sending money not to hang out or talk on the phone i find it disrespectful and hes not with that person why should you talk to them. but dont keep it from your SO he might get suspicious and has every right to.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:56 PM on Mar. 4, 2009

  • i think you should meet. you are not doing anything wrong. maybe your husband has insecurity issues. talk with him find out why it is so weird for him and let him know how it makes you feel when he says the snide comments. you have an opportunity for a good friendship here don't throw it away just because he maybe a little insecure.

    Answer by clumm at 1:58 PM on Mar. 4, 2009

  • I don't think it's ever wise to hang out with an ex.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:01 PM on Mar. 4, 2009

  • im not asking if its wise to hang out with my ex its his girlfriend... him and i never had sex or got past kissing for htat matter. I have no desire to "hang" with him other than maybe them come for movie/game night or football night. And as for hanging with the ex i have to deal with his every christmas and thanksgiving so i understnad why that would be uncomfortable and why he might ? things.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:05 PM on Mar. 4, 2009

  • I had this issue awhile back too. My ex's girlfriend had a child just under my son's age and she wanted to join my local playgroup. I didn't think much of it and we did get along great, but my husband thought it was strange too. I never had any contact with my ex (nor wanted to, he was and is a jerk) but I guess just the idea of me hanging out with his current girlfriend made my husband feel like we may run into each other again. My situation was probably a little different though, since my ex was abusive and it took a long time for the idiot to even stop stalking me and leave me alone after we split. I think my husband was just afraid that hanging out with his girlfriend could have sparked my ex's interest and we'd have issues with him again. That didn't end up being the case though and the girl really was a sweetheart. She ended up leaving my ex as well and though she moved away we still chat occasionally.

    Answer by MommyToSmeech at 2:06 PM on Mar. 4, 2009

  • its not the girl that is the problem in your hubbies eyes... its that you will be getting very close the your ex that is bothering him... maybe you should talk to him about this, get it out in the air.

    Answer by MommaTasha1003 at 2:09 PM on Mar. 4, 2009

  • Don't do it you are only asking for trouble it might seem innocent at first but you never know turn the tables around would you like it?

    The past is the past and live in your new present. It is not about that he does not trust you...You just don't do things like this. You might not mean nothing by it but guys have other things in mind. So what if you are compatible are you trying to tell your dh something.  If not don't do this. GL


    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 2:15 PM on Mar. 4, 2009

  • Wow I don't see any problem with this. I mean its not like you are gonna hang out with your ex or anything and if you do she'll be there most likely. If you wanna become good friends with her than do it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:30 PM on Mar. 4, 2009

  • I can understand both sides of this. But remember, you are married to this man and agreed to honor, respect, etc. each other. If he has a problem with it, then just let it go. Is this new girl really worth losing a marriage over? There are thousands of girls out there you can be friends with. You need to take your husband's feelings into consideration and respect them even if you don't agree with it. Doing it anyway is just doing to cause a fight. In the end, is it really worth it?

    Answer by DDry at 2:41 PM on Mar. 4, 2009

  • i know it would be safer for me to not hang with any of my ex's and my SO knows he better not. especially not the most recent one.

    Answer by JuJu_Bean at 2:48 PM on Mar. 4, 2009

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