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Ever feel this way?

Have you ever had an interaction with your child and immediately thought, 'oh, my, that was not good mothering.'? I was just thinking that people that have a whole bunch of kids must either be way better people than I am, or completely out of their minds! I have one child, a 19-month old daughter, who, overall, is very sweet. Lately, though, EVERYTHING has become a battle. I'm consistent and I don't yell or anything, but holy cow it's difficult! Food goes on the floor, she kicks at me when I'm changing her diaper, etc. etc. I get to the end of the day sometimes, and I'm exhausted.
I used to teach severe behavior problem kids in center-city Philly..I was the last step before they got locked up. How in the world does this one little peanut make me so exhausted and perplexed?

Answer Question
 
divakristi

Asked by divakristi at 2:09 PM on Mar. 4, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 2 (10 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • I've got three kids, Troy 7 months, Tiffany 2yrs, and Marshall 5yrs... I am always tired. Because they're my kids I find the strength to be a good mum... If they weren't my kids... Well that would be a different story!!! Don't get me wrong but sometimes, with kids it can be like watching a bad movie on repeat... The same problems, nappys, screaming (them not me!!!)... But there are amazing days, or just a bit out of every day that keeps us all going as a family. It's hard for all of us with Marsh's ADHD.
    lara_b

    Answer by lara_b at 2:17 PM on Mar. 4, 2009

  • It's the nature of the beast. Hang in there and keep doing what you're doing and everything will be fine. It's definitely exhausting but so worth it in the end.
    Hang in there!
    twinclubmom

    Answer by twinclubmom at 2:24 PM on Mar. 4, 2009

  • I hear you... my DD is so sweet when she gets what she wants (which isn't often considering she likes to do dangerous things) And sometimes when the whinning gets too much I don't have it in me to say "Savannah, honey, lets go play together, and leave the refridgerator alone" just an annoyed "SAVANNAH, STOP" comes out. I feel bad for yelling at my kid, but sometimes stress and fatigue creep up on a mom with a full time job.
    Mom2vanna

    Answer by Mom2vanna at 2:26 PM on Mar. 4, 2009

  • Haha, that made me laugh what you said about moms with a bunch of kids. I don't have a bunch, just 2, but the older is 21 months. Before her sister was born, I thought there was no way I would be able to keep my cool with two of them. Now I've realized that having a toddler is having a toddler -- if you can do that you can do anything else, too. So don't feel like a bad mom if just one feels like a challenge! Sometimes you can live up to your ideal (I swear I won't say "no," I will always positively redirect her energies) but let's face it, you can't always be on top of your game when you have things to do, fatigue, and you need to pay attention to your own needs, too. When my daughter started going around saying "that's a no-no" to her dolls and threatening time-out, I felt so guilty. But as long as you do your personal best, and try to focus on your pleasant moments together, you'll both come out alright in the end!
    EmilySusan

    Answer by EmilySusan at 2:40 PM on Mar. 4, 2009

  • I'm always second guessing myself. I have three boys 5, 3 and 2 years. All three have special needs (delays) and the oldest two are on the autism spectrum (the eldest also has ADHD). I have therapy sessions, school sessions, doctor's appointments, evaluations, activities, etc all to keep straight. I lose my temper quite easily some days it seems and I spend the evenings trying to cuddle all three of them at once to make up for my short comings.

    I feel horrible a lot. I always wonder if I'm doing right by them. I second guess myself a lot, too.
    TiccledBlue

    Answer by TiccledBlue at 4:12 PM on Mar. 4, 2009

  • It's very hard to be a good mom sometimes when you are reaching your limit, but know that you are miles ahead of some moms just in that at least you are making an effort not to yell, not to hit, and not to lose your cool in general. It takes maturity and self-restraint and Sophie is lucky that she has a mommy who values her enough to show that restraint. Hang in there! Tomorrow is another day.
    leahjoy

    Answer by leahjoy at 5:12 PM on Mar. 4, 2009

  • I know how you feel. I have an 18 mos old and she is alot to handle. Especially when I work all day then go home and take care of her and its tough I know but I'm jus waiting til I pass thru this stage too.
    Native_Mommy253

    Answer by Native_Mommy253 at 5:32 PM on Mar. 4, 2009

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