its seems that they are only nice and caring when they wants something from me. I try to look at it as they are only kids, 16, 18 21,. sometimes it makes me angry, am i wrong for feeling this way?
Asked by Anonymous at 11:56 PM on Mar. 4, 2009 in Adult Children (18+)
Answer by aly38914290 at 12:02 AM on Mar. 5, 2009
I tried so hard to be good to my step daughters, but none of it mattered. When push come to shove them still chose to stab me in the back for their neglectful mother. I don't try anymore. My husband has a relationship with them separate from me and our kids.
Answer by Anonymous at 11:59 PM on Mar. 4, 2009
Answer by toriandgrace at 11:59 PM on Mar. 4, 2009
Answer by josalin at 11:59 PM on Mar. 4, 2009
Answer by palexander at 12:49 AM on Mar. 5, 2009
Answer by canadianmom1974 at 1:13 AM on Mar. 5, 2009
Answer by lalasha at 2:16 AM on Mar. 5, 2009
At those ages--they are not "just kids" they are young adults and are manipulating you. Bottom line, stop "giving" them what they want and try building an adult relationship with them. You are teaching them to be manipulative brats--NOT adults. The best thing to do is sit down with them, explain to them that you have been allowing behavior that is not conducive to their growing up and it will stop. You will no longer be manipulated and used. If that is not an option, at least stop giving in to them because ultimately, you are crippling them as adults. People treat us the way we teach them to a great extent----it is time you stop trying to "earn" their love and start treating them as adults.....
Answer by Anonymous at 10:30 AM on Mar. 5, 2009
I adore my step father. He came into my life when I was 14. I gave him hell for a couple years. As I got older my heart tendered toward him. Without him, I fear I might have made some life altering mistakes. I am 40 now and he still is my bestest buddy and I adore him all the more as the years have gone on.
Hang in there step-mom, their hearts will tender as they learn to love you as you love them.
Answer by GypsyWillow at 11:12 AM on Mar. 5, 2009
Answer by admckenzie at 3:18 PM on Mar. 5, 2009