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So what do you do when your 14 year old defies your rules?

You ground them, they find ways to sneak around while you are at work, so you ground them until they start staying grounded. Yeah you guessed it they might not ever be ungrounded. So let's say they do good for a week then as soon as they are ungrounded they do the same old crap again?

Things already been done.
1. Took away cell phone
2. Took away the ability to have sleepovers anywhere other than my house.
3. Can't go to the movies
4. Room has literally been stripped, not like he ever spent much time in there anyways.
5. Sent him to a counsellor who basically told me he isn't going to stop the behaviors that are getting him into trouble till he wants too...WTF am I just supposed to sit back and let him do this sh*t? I send him to you to help not justifiy his behaviors to him.

What do you do when you feel like you have done everything with the exception of beating his a$$?


Asked by SheriSanchez at 2:24 PM on Mar. 5, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

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Answers (25)
  • I can see the interviews now:

    You: "Hi! I am...and this is my son...I am sure you two want to get to know each other well, but for now I have a few questions for you."
    Him: "Okay...sure."
    You: "If my son wanted to leave the house while I am at work and I had told him no, how would you handle the situation?"
    Him: "Well, I had this one kid that tried the same thing. I found that a locked closet worked real well. Of course, I had to install a good lock on it."
    You: "Hmmm..okay..that sounds reasonable. He also likes to think he can smoke. How would you handle him asking/hounding for cigarettes?"
    Him: "Man! I love to smoke! I can just sit and blow smoke in his face all afternoon!"

    Man...oh, man...the fun you could have...Of course after the "interview" is over you need to sit down with DS and discuss why you think *this* sitter is the best one for the job...and let him argue why he wouldn't be!

    Answer by tandknix at 2:59 PM on Mar. 5, 2009

  • Do I beat his a$$, I don't think physically hurting him is going to help. I can't do this anymore I am making myself sick over his behaviors, maybe I could beat his Dad...Nope I'll gop to jail for that.

    Answer by SheriSanchez at 2:26 PM on Mar. 5, 2009

  • ha ha my son has been grounded for two months and is working on three

    Answer by jodi205 at 2:34 PM on Mar. 5, 2009

  • I know it is so pathetic, and his Dad is so non shallanty about it. I am worrying myself sick abnout it. I will just never forgive myself if something happens to him and at the rate he is going he is on a collision course of danger.

    Answer by SheriSanchez at 2:39 PM on Mar. 5, 2009

  • I would seriously consider hiring a sitter. I know it would stink to have to pay for one, but I bet you can get someone fairly cheap (male college student) or someone who wants to earn a few extra $$$ for a few hours each day. Maybe he would be embarrassed enough that he *might* decide he can straighten up. At least you would have someone who could call you if he decides to leave the house and you can go from there...

    Answer by tandknix at 2:44 PM on Mar. 5, 2009

  • OR you can explain to him that you have put an ad in the paper and that you are looking for a babysitter for him. Act like you included his name...his FULL Have people he doesn't know "apply" and interview with you and him so he thinks you are serious. Have them act like they are just nuts while you take them seriously...

    Answer by tandknix at 2:46 PM on Mar. 5, 2009

  • Tandknix I love it Hilarious....

    Answer by mirit.rose at 2:51 PM on Mar. 5, 2009

  • The problem is, is that he is such a little charmer. I got a Nanny last year for my newborn and we grilled her about what not to let the older boys do and my little monster got her to give him smokes, I found this out after I fired her along with other things, plus he is a sneaky little turd, one time he stuffed his bed and shut his door which doesn't lock now for that reason and snucjk out, I came home early and caught him, it just extends his groundings but seriously he's not stayiong grounded his freedoms are just minimized. He's wearing me out.

    Answer by SheriSanchez at 2:51 PM on Mar. 5, 2009

  • I like the ad idea, I would have to hire a real jerk and give him permission to restrain him. Uggg if I make it thru the next 4 years and he is still alive and has all of his limbs it'll be a miracle.

    Answer by SheriSanchez at 2:53 PM on Mar. 5, 2009

  • Well, that was a crappy nanny! Never have I EVER giving a child illegal substances...I won't even buy the stuff for my brothers who are 17,18, 19... :) Sorry..not gonna happen...

    Does he act like he cares? Would threatening him with an after school type boot camp do any good?

    Answer by tandknix at 2:55 PM on Mar. 5, 2009