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Should I be so sensitive about bad language?

I have a 13yo girl, and all her life I have strongly requested that nobody swear around her and for the most part everyone has respected my request. But should I still be sheltering her? I mean yeah it still bothers me, I'm still sensitive, when someone swears around her, but I'm starting to think that maybe she is just too old to be sheltered from that anymore. I know she probably hears this stuff at school too. I don't know what do you all think? Should I be so sensitive at her age or should I change?

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felicia0923

Asked by felicia0923 at 5:04 PM on Mar. 5, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

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Answers (11)
  • I think that by now she has probably heard pretty much every word there is. You can continue to model appropriate language, but I think it's time to stop protecting her ears. But take my advice with a grain of salt, because my kiddo is only 2. :-)
    BlueFrogMama

    Answer by BlueFrogMama at 5:06 PM on Mar. 5, 2009

  • At that age, your right she's hearing it at school. My parents never cursed around me and they didn't permit us to be around those that did. It was helpful when we were little, but once we reached middle/high school we heard things that our parents hadn't even heard of. Just strongly instill that the use of words longe than 4 letters makes her sound more intelligent, LOL! If you raised her the way you say then she'll be fine hearing a few curse words!
    sidzwif

    Answer by sidzwif at 5:07 PM on Mar. 5, 2009

  • You can't stop the world from cursing around her, but you don't have to
    erase all of your hard work by cursing in front of her yourself.
    Remain the same pure mommy model citizen and tell her that
    although vulgar mouthed people might use that language, LADIES
    dont and anyone who deserves respect doesn't have cuss words in
    their everyday vocabulary.
    bronxcouture

    Answer by bronxcouture at 5:15 PM on Mar. 5, 2009

  • My parents swore a lot. I didn't swear once until I was like 15. I thought it made them sound stupid. I think you should reinforce your own beliefs, but understand she is being exposed at school. Encourage her to use a wider vocabulary that doesn't include those kinds of words.
    Mom1Stepmom1

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 5:51 PM on Mar. 5, 2009

  • There is nothing wrong with forcing the people around your daughter to set a good example. Who cares if she hears it at school. She will still grow up knowing where the appropriate boundaries are and how to use her words for the positive.
    kemclaughlin

    Answer by kemclaughlin at 6:11 PM on Mar. 5, 2009

  • I think it's good that she has a mommy that's so protective of her. She may hear it at school all the time, but not hearing it from adults she respects will make her more likely to abstain from cursing herself. It sounds so distasteful!
    MicahsMom612

    Answer by MicahsMom612 at 7:19 PM on Mar. 5, 2009

  • stick with your principals. She will remember your rules when she is a mother.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:34 PM on Mar. 5, 2009

  • There is nothing wrong with asking people to not use strong language around you and your daughter! She is probably hearing it elsewhere anyway, such as at school, but why not have your home as a haven?

    As a friend pointed out on another group, using strong language in everyday conversation leaves you with no way to properly express yourself when things really hit the fan. When Mary Poppins swears, you know something is seriously wrong. When a rapper swears, it tells you he is breathing!
    Manth

    Answer by Manth at 8:09 PM on Mar. 5, 2009

  • Awww.. is this your oldest child? I think you have to have an acceptable standard of rules for your daughter and for your home. She should know them well by now. And she should brief her piers on what they are before they come over or at the very least while they are there. As far as sheltering her.. it is difficult to let go! Spend some time in the middle school and you will see the bombs fly left and right. She is hearing a steady flow of profanity all day long. Both at school and threw the multi media outlets!!


    I am sure you are doing a great job Mom! Good luck ..

    3gr8tKids

    Answer by 3gr8tKids at 7:47 AM on Mar. 6, 2009

  • Funny, when I was growing up my Mom could use "colorful" language in her daily stories and interactions and we never thought much of it. It worked out great because we never felt a need to use it and because nobody made a big deal out of it, we were fine. With my two girls ages 12 and 10 I use choice words sometimes and it's no big deal in our house. We have taught the girls to use appropriate language but in our home if a word sneaks out sometimes it's OK. The girls do have friends that have parents who don't allow language in their homes and are having terrible times keeping the kids from refraining in using it. I know it doesn't make it right, but all kids get exposed to that and so much more I guess we just need to choose our battles. I think all kids should respect whatever rules their parents set up in their homes. good luck...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:51 PM on Mar. 6, 2009

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