• In the Spotlight:
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

My friend sent a text to my hubby, should I have not gotten mad?

I keep thinking that I over-reacted, but my friend sent a pic to my hubby's phone of questionable modesty (nice way of saying EWWW!), and then said it was an accident and her phone had a glitch. I told her that she needs to keep a better eye on her phone and that it was unacceptable that he received that message from her.
Then.... she sent me a message saying that it hurt her the way I handled it.
I sent a message back apologizing and saying that I should have waited to call her instead of jumping to conclusions.
She said (on Facebook):
well it has pushed us farther apart. and so you guys won't ever get texts from me ever again cause i'm removing the numbers from my phone. ill just keep in touch with you on here or something.

So... did I do something wrong here?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:32 AM on Mar. 7, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (19)
  • I don't think so. Not one bit!
    Luisa621

    Answer by Luisa621 at 1:36 AM on Mar. 7, 2009

  • What was the picture of exactly?

    I'd probably give my friend the benefit of the doubt. However I am a very secure person and I do not have jealousy issues at all. It sounds like you lost a friend over this....so basically I think you can tell in your gut if you over reacted or not. Was it worth it to lose your friend? If you know really have to question if you over reacted then I'm gonna guess you probably did.

    But then again, without seeing the picture I don't know.

    My best friend texts my husband all the time. Her husband and I text on occassion. I trust both my BFF and my DH completely so it doesn't bother me at all.
    munch12502

    Answer by munch12502 at 1:37 AM on Mar. 7, 2009

  • Whatever...she should have apologized to you for sending an inappropriate text. Tell her good riddance. She over stepped her boundary and had the audacity to lie about it. Some friend she is..you apologized, she should have gotten over it..now she's giving you the guilt trip. Don't play into her hands.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:38 AM on Mar. 7, 2009

  • The guilty dog barks the loudest. She reacted in a defensive manner and that usually constitutes guilt.  She should have been saying she was sorry not being defensive about it.

    pnwmom

    Answer by pnwmom at 1:42 AM on Mar. 7, 2009

  • I don't think there's anything wrong with telling her that she sent an inappropriate picture to your dh, and that she needs to be more careful about who she sends pictures like that to. Now, unless you have reason to believe that she's interested in your dh in an inappropriate way, I don't think I would imply that she did it on purpose or anything like that.

    I think she's probably embarrassed that she sent the pic to him, and rather than admitting that, she's turning it around and getting offended that you were upset about it.

    If you want, you could maybe approach her about it and explain that you don't think she meant to send it to him, but that it embarrassed both you and your dh, and that you are also concerned for her, because who else has she maybe sent pictures like that to by mistake?
    sailorwifenmom

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 1:43 AM on Mar. 7, 2009

  • Methinks the lady doth protest too much.

    No, you weren't wrong.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 3:29 AM on Mar. 7, 2009

  • I would have reacted the same way. I bet she just was surprised that your DH isn't a dog and told you that she sent it. She shouldn't have your husbands phone number anyway.. none of my friends have my husbands number. if they need to ask him something, they can ask him through me.
    MJ_BN_FE

    Answer by MJ_BN_FE at 3:46 AM on Mar. 7, 2009

  • Uh.. no she probably knew what she was doing and because it "didn't work" she is now not owning up to it and making you feel guilty ( this is of course if the pic of questionable nature is of her!)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:51 AM on Mar. 7, 2009

  • I dont think you did anything wrong. Sounds like she's over reacting to your response. Did she tell you who the picture was really meant for?
    jackdaw

    Answer by jackdaw at 3:58 AM on Mar. 7, 2009

  • if i had sent a pic like that to my friends hubby by accident i wouldn't wait to see if he said anything to his wife (my friend) i would ring her and tell her what happened and apologize and i'd apologize to him as well...sounds like she got caught out and is being defensive coz she knows she did wrong ..amazing how she tried to turn it around & made you feel guilty ...also i would be the one saying delete our numbers..as for her contacting you on facebook or elsewhere that's your choice. where does she get the idea that you and her will continue to be friends if thats what she wants ....... i would say good riddance and i'd be telling her how it's going to be ...


     


    you did nothing wrong if it was me i would have told her whats whatend of story . i wouldn't allow her to make me feel like any of it is my fault

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:54 AM on Mar. 7, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.