Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

how do I get my teen to talk to me about anything

Answer Question

Asked by flowerchid72 at 10:46 PM on Mar. 7, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

Level 5 (83 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • You can't. It doesn't work that way. Especially if it's a girl. I went through that with my parents and my sisters did also. Eventually we grow out of it and then we tell them everything. Stuff they don't want to know. lol. I think you'll just have to wait but let her know you're there to listen if she ever wants to talk.

    Answer by Kaytlynsmommy at 10:48 PM on Mar. 7, 2009

  • be careful what you wish you really want to hear a sexually fantasy someday downt he road lol? seriously the way i get my son to talk to me is just be letting him know there si nothing he could tell me that would make me think hes weird or love himless. Then when he does share, I be sure to react CALMLY( even if inside i am screaming) because one wrong reaction , look or word, and you lose alot of ground. I want my sonto know he can talk to me about anything he needs to, but i also want him to be able to share wioth others as one day I willnto be here,a nd he will have his own wife and need to knwo how to communitcate with her too.

    Answer by Bearsjen at 10:49 PM on Mar. 7, 2009

  • I am 19 and I never talked to my mom and still dont really. I would love to and thats something most girls I have learned feel. But the problem is we can't tell you guys the truth without a lecture or a harsh reaction. The best advice I have is just listen and NEVER OVER REACT, thats the worse. If they are drinking hey they are going todo it either way might as well just know they are safely doing it( I am in no way say your child is or that underage drinking is ok, but over reacting will only make them want to do it more and that can turn in to something bad) take time to listen and offer advice no critisum for how they handled something or what they did just because it wasnt what you think should have been done. It's going to take time but it will work and in the end be good for both of you.Hope this helps

    Answer by TristansMommy16 at 10:56 PM on Mar. 7, 2009

  • We all want our children to speak to us...

    Some parents dont't... I don't know why that is.

    My son is 10 and my daugther is 6... Everyday we have an open dissussion one on one on what may be on their mind..

    I always have done that since I can remember.. It doesn't matter if they talk about their lunch food, cartoons, about me or whatever.. I have develop a communication base with them.. so when they get older they know they can come and talk to me about any and everything.

    I always tell them EVERYDAY don't be afraid to talk to me.. I will listen no matter what subject it may be..

    My son whose 10.. had a question about sex... He over heard a little boy in his class talking about it and he was curious..

    I made sure I didn't make a face expression, I was serious but he thought I was lay back.. My heart dropped but he didnt't know..

    Because I want him to be able to talk to me about any and everythi

    Answer by Elizabeth1837 at 11:54 AM on Mar. 8, 2009

  • Continue from Elizabeth1837:

    He says mother I am excited to know I can talk to you about what's on my mind...

    Because you dont judge my feeling or what I am thinking at the time...

    My friends says they can't speak to their parents because they either don't want to hear about it, get scold at, or their parents don't care..

    The answer to your question: It is important to have one on one time with your children.. Make sure they know you will be there for them, When they ask you a question that may put you in shock mode... Be careful of how you respond because you want them to be able to trust and come to you when they are confused about something.

    It's wonderful to keep communication lines open with our children... Because they learn from their friends now a days ( their friends dont know any better either)...

    Mother, you asked the right question... Be invloved and curious of what may be on your child mind

    Answer by Elizabeth1837 at 12:01 PM on Mar. 8, 2009

  • Continue Elizabeth1837:

    Our Children wants us to listen.. They want us to be there.. It's all about how we handle the question they ask..

    Be Invloved... Because we all should want to know whats going on with our children when we are not around..


    Answer by Elizabeth1837 at 12:05 PM on Mar. 8, 2009

  • You've got to let them know they can talk to you about anything and that you'll try to answer thier questions the best way you can and will try to listen to what they are saying

    Answer by Amber-Leigh at 1:52 PM on Mar. 8, 2009

  • Do you talk to your teen? Does your teen talk back at those times? If yes, your teen is talking to you. You are at the point of wanting to share everything like a friend would. Well, not yet. You still have to be the parent. Your teen will not be a "teen" much longer and then the sharing and friendship will begin. Be patient and continue to be a good parent and guide your teen into adulthood. The friendship is just over thehorizon. Trust me - I have arrived and it is GREAT!

    Answer by jesse123456 at 4:17 PM on Mar. 8, 2009

  • Actually you can depending. It depends on you, the teen, both of your past, there trust in you and your willingness. Speaking as some one who is not to far from teen years. I remember well. I also always told my mom everything and the truth. 1st of though are you sure you want to know. If you are there are a couple rules. Be honest never lie No matter what even the smallest could make us not confide. 2nd have an open mind you may hear things you don't want to. Don't judge, freak out, or ever say how does this make me look to your teen. 3rd listen to the whole story before giving advice. When you do give advice do it positively. Dont' say are you dumb. Or what the hell were you thinking. They take as your not understanding. Last but not least inadvertedly and unacknowledgably we think life evolves around us. So say stuff like that's unfair to you. And I want to make it easy for you. That's a start to open comunication.

    Answer by hot-mama86 at 11:40 PM on Mar. 8, 2009

  • Also try talking to him/her in the car, you are partially distracted, but the side by side instead of face to face seems to make it easier for teens to open up.

    Answer by goaliemom93 at 8:45 AM on Mar. 9, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.