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What can I do to a 16 yr.old daughter who tells you that she will not clean up her room and still wants to hang with friends.Please help me????

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Asked by Anonymous at 12:48 AM on Jun. 20, 2008 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (10)
  • i would take money away like i would give her a 20 and take a dollar away until she cleaned it up

    Answer by Patience1 at 12:49 AM on Jun. 20, 2008

  • is it necessary that her room be clean? teenagers go through enough as it is. if it is necessary to you then maybe you can comprimise, like "make your bed and keep your clothes in your closet" or something like that. come up with something fair. if she doesn't want to do that, explain to her that it is important to you and that some day she will understand better why. ask her if there's something else she'd rather clean so you can help with her room (ie, dishes, litter box, trash, etc)
    take away privilages if none of that works.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:58 AM on Jun. 20, 2008

  • You are never going to get your dirvers license that's the first thing. Then tell her you will clean her room for her. Everything will be going in the trash! So get your tushy movin or else. She will need to get a job to get new cloths she loves so much, and shoes, and and and. Just reminder of this. It is your house, your rules. She can be messy in her own home after college one day.

    Answer by Jgirl at 1:08 AM on Jun. 20, 2008

  • PS CLeanlyness is next to godlyness. I am not religious at all, but I preach this one. It is important that no matter what stage of your life that you are in to be clean, on time, and respectful of others. NO MATTER WHAT!

    Answer by Jgirl at 1:10 AM on Jun. 20, 2008

  • If she doesn't do her chores she doesn't get priveledges. Period. She has to learn responsibility. Work comes before pleasure :)

    Answer by Caiged at 2:00 AM on Jun. 20, 2008

  • It's simple. You're the parent, you're in charge. She can sit in her messy room (besides going to school), and not go anywhere or do anything until it's clean and she learns how to respect you. By not cleaning her room and telling you no, she is disrespecting you as a parent. Yes what she is doing is normal for a teen, but it shouldn't go unpunished. Remove things from her life that are important to her until she learns to do the right thing (phone, cell, computer, drivers license, car, whatever else is important to her). If that doesn't work, go through her room and put everything in trash bags, then make her earn it back little by little. If she doesn't earn it back, donate it to charity.. someone will appreciate it.

    Answer by jamie8506 at 2:22 AM on Jun. 20, 2008

  • You don't pay your kids to clean up their room, they should be happy they have a room! It's their responsability to clean it up! OR she can make up for it by cleaning something else in the house. No if's and or but's if she doesn't clean it she's not leaving the house, or getting anything new.

    Answer by Ifiwereabook at 10:33 AM on Jun. 21, 2008

  • I took everything her attention, and she earned everything back. She now cooks and cleans.......

    Answer by ToldUNo at 2:03 PM on Jun. 29, 2008

  • Well, I am 20 so I remember. It got to the point that I wouldn't do it. My mom got a giant trash bag for clothes on the floor one for toys books and misc... and another for odds and ends. She would say I will throw all of it out if it doesn't get where it belongs. Harsh but it worked I actually threw out some of my own stuff I did not need. Most of a 16 year olds mess is clothes and trash. If she has a problem with that, if you do her laundry don't do it. She will figure it out. If you think that is too harsh then i would say just take it all away and have her earn it back by doing other chores: dishes, laundry, and misc..things.

    Answer by Ellie4040 at 8:06 AM on Jul. 8, 2008

  • Honestly - as long as there is no food or dishes in there and the mess isn't crawling out the door- its her room. My daughter is not allowed to trash the rest of the house, but that is her space. Periodically she gets sick of it and actually cleans it herself.

    Answer by MysticFerret at 1:45 PM on Aug. 2, 2008

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