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My chest hurts!!

My husband is umemployed and will not be receiving unemployment. I am working full time and he will not look for more than ONE job every few weeks. Our savings is gone and we are barely breaking even on the basic bills with my paycheck. The worksource office was crowded today so he said he was going home to post up on the couch. He applies for jobs that he does not have the qualifications for and doesn't apply for the jobs he does. I think he deliberately does not want to try to find a job so he can stay at home. He keeps going fishing and spending money on gas, snacks and his fishing supplies. I want to give him an ultamatum: Keep looking or go stay(and fish) somewhere else. He does not help out at home, not looking for a job and he has no problem with that. Keeps saying"Something will come along." Well, you have to apply first!!!What do you think? It's giving me chest pains. I love everything else about him but geez!!

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Asked by Anonymous at 4:56 PM on Mar. 9, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (3)
  • If he can't contribute or make an effort to contribute, I say it's time for tough love. If he can't find a "real" job then he needs to be doing everything around the house and out doing side jobs for people if he can. My husband lost his job (oil field) and spent 8 hours a day looking for things. Then he would come home and look on the internet, make phone calls, etc. He did all of the housework as well. It sounds like he is being lazy and he needs to tough love!

    Answer by DDry at 4:59 PM on Mar. 9, 2009

  • It doesn't look good, does it. You are already working full time. I am afraid that your health is being endangered by the stress. Do you think you are having a heart attack? or perhaps it is acid reflux caused by the stress? You may be better off without him, I am sorry to say. Would a trial separation help? I hope things start working out better for you. Would you please post updates so we know how you are?

    Answer by Bmat at 5:01 PM on Mar. 9, 2009

  • He needs to move out until he can find a job. Cut him off! Tell him he can come back when he has a full time job.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:43 PM on Mar. 9, 2009

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