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i need advise

I recently had a baby and the father and i are no longer together in fact he is seeing someone else! I have made it very clear that i do not want her around my child because of the activities she part takes in ( such as drugs) He asked if could take my son so that his parents could see him. I told his father that he could take my son as long has his girlfriend was not there. He promised me that is was not there and would not be there. but the next day pictures of her holding my son turned up on her myspace. I do not think that she should have the right to put pictures of my son on her myspace i want the pictures taken down. But i want to know if other moms think i am over reacting!

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:11 PM on Mar. 9, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (7)
  • well me and the father of my baby are no longer together and Im seeing other people and so is he and I told him as long as they aren't having a negative influence on our daughter I wouldn't mind because you cant be a hypocrite when you start seeing someone and having a new man around his kid. But if she does drugs I can understand that and he could get in a lot of trouble for it, like my ex after separted he became this party animal and had my daughter in the house when he was throwing these parties with drunk people and strangers and I was furious when I found out so I got my lawyer on his butt and let me tellyou my lawyer scared him to death that he could take aly completely away from him so he stopped doing it. I don't think your overreacting since she does drugs.

    Answer by HollyRose at 8:16 PM on Mar. 9, 2009

  • I would be more worried about the lie than the actual pictures. I think the key is to try and stay calm so as to try and not make the ex and gf mad. If she gets mad then she might leave them up just to spite you. I would confront your ex and see what he says. And ask her, nicely, to take the pics down. See how it goes and go from there.

    Answer by kboney29 at 8:18 PM on Mar. 9, 2009

  • Yeah, you have a right to have myspace take down the pictures of YOUR kid.
    Other than that, it sounds as though you aren't allowing your sons fathers girlfriend around your child because you're jealous. That's not a valid reason.
    If she does do drugs, go to court and have them both drug tested. If she fails (or both of them do) she will be told not to come around during visits and he will not be allowed to have unsupervised visits (if he were to fail as well.)
    If they come back clean, then there will be nothing you can do. You can't ban or punish a father for having a new girl friend.
    And also be prepared that you will probably have to take a drug test yourself if you request one for them.

    Answer by AriMicSun at 10:39 PM on Mar. 9, 2009

  • If you weren't married and didn't go to court for custody rights then he really can't do anything about seeing your child unless he takes you to court which would require him to hire a lawyer. Even if he is paying Child support he can't do anything about seeing your child. I say since he can't tell the truth about what he's doing with your child keep the baby away from him, tell him since he's a liar, he can visit the child at your place of residence under supervision and if his family wants the see the child the same applies

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:49 PM on Mar. 9, 2009

  • The pictures are a sidenote. it's the lying that isn't cool. But with internet predators, I'd insist the pics weren't authorized and need to come down.

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 10:55 PM on Mar. 9, 2009

  • Me and my husband have a rule that if we ever divorce we will not have our SO's around our children, it would make us feel terrible not to mention jealous out of our minds. We agreed that they would only be around them when things were serious, that might sound crazy, but I don't want another women assuming my role as a mother unless it was serious, it's terriblr to have people in and out of a childs life.

    Answer by Rachel24517 at 12:36 PM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • rachel24517 thank you for answering my question i feel the same way i dont want woman or men coming in and out of sons life but my ex does not agree with me

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:06 PM on Mar. 10, 2009

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