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How to deal with 5yo who "tickles" her vagina all the time.

I am at my wits end!!! About a year ago my daughter started to "tickle" her privates and it seems like its only gotten worse. I've talked to the doc and looked up online how to handle this situation but to no avail. I tried explaning to her that this is something that should be done in private but she just doesn't listen. Her little sister shares a room with her and is always telling me "sister is doing it again mother". I don't want my younger daughter to pick up on this habit. She does this several times. When she gets home from school at noon till bedtime at 8:30 I'd say she does it about 4-7 times. Sometimes putting herself to sleep doing this. Someone, anyone PLEASE HELP ME!!!! I need to know how to get her to take it easy on doing it so often and getting her to do it in private.

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Asked by Anonymous at 8:13 PM on Mar. 9, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Answers (8)
  • When i worked in a daycare, we had a little girl who did this at nap time. Her mom was aware and was mortified. She did it for pretty much the whole 3 hours the kids were supposed to be napping. She was 4. Her mom told the doc and her doc said it was normal and it will pass. Just explain to her that it MUST be done in private (which it looks like you already have). I know this doesn't really help much, but that's all I know about it.


    Answer by Anonymous at 8:24 PM on Mar. 9, 2009

  • I did this as a child and only ever did it in private. Nobody knows I did that...and my earliest memory of it was when I was 6 years old. Keep stressing to her that it is a private time thing only. Wish I could tell you more!

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:47 PM on Mar. 9, 2009

  • As long as you checked with her pediatrician to rule out an itchy urinary track infection and are sure the perfume and dyes in the laundry soap and fabric softener isn't irritating sensitive areas... The"do it in private" talk is your best bet.   What rewards are you using to encourage discrete behavior? If she isn't responding to those carrots maybe a series of privilege losses would do the trick.


    Answer by Anonymous at 8:49 PM on Mar. 9, 2009

  • Have you heard of Frued? He belived that there are 5 stages of psychosexual development in a child; oral, anal, phallic, latent, and genital. Sounds like your 5 year old is just doing what Frued said she would do. He says that if all stages are completed sucessfully your child will turn into a well-balanced, warm, and caring person. If she's learning from an older sibling you might have to explain masterbation, in the most general manner you can, and just keep up on your "only in private" talk. You don't want to teach her that what she's doing is "bad" or "not normal." Just make sure she understands that its a very private thing.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:24 PM on Mar. 9, 2009

  • let her know that somethings she needs to do when she's alone. We had this girlt he other day walking through work skirt hiked up and hand in her pants. While I see there is nothing wrong with it I do feel that's something that should be done inprivacy.

    Answer by pagirl71 at 10:16 AM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • Sometimes kids who are sexually absued or witness something too expecit may behave like this. Have you looked in to that possibility.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:26 PM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • Sometimes kids who are sexually abused or witness something too explicit may behave like this. Have you looked in to that possibility.


    Answer by Anonymous at 1:27 PM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • This is common for children my daughter did something similar but I didn't have a problem with her doing it in private. The only thing you might consider is a punishment for doing this outside of her bedroom or the bathroom where ever you prefer her to conduct this. Stress the fact that it is where she is doing this that is the problem.

    Peace, <>

    Answer by JoyceTN at 5:14 PM on Mar. 10, 2009

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