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Why does this bug me?

We just moved to a new town, where my in laws live. And I have one child that goes to school. We were all supposed to be a team in taking the kids to school. ( 4 kids in all) well I did my part I would call the night before and see who was taking the kids, and who was picking them up after school. For a whole week, we were working as a team. Now, these past 2 weeks, they have been taking my son to school, and so I thought well if they take them I'll pick them up. So I would call and see which kids to pick up ::bc some would stay late etc.:: they say only pick your child up. And then yesterday I was going to pick them up and take them to school, but then I couldnt bc I had stayed up all night with my younger daughter, and didnt get any sleep. So I wanted her and I to sleep in. No biggie right. Well now it seems that they dont want me to drop off or pick up the other kids, only my child. Why does this bug me??

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Asked by Anonymous at 9:23 AM on Mar. 10, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • Not sure. Maybe because you feel you and your child are somehow being excluded? That could be tough, since you are new in town. Or maybe just because you had an agreed upon plan and nobody is sticking to it, which might feel like disrespect to some people.

    Answer by BlueFrogMama at 9:26 AM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • I agree with the above poster. Maybe it's because people aren't sticking with the plan. Personally, I wouldn't be upset. I know my children are my responsibility and I do not expect anyone else's help other than my husband, of course. He and I are a team and we don't really want or need help from anyone else. Other people are never 100% reliable so it works better for us to do it ourselves. So it's hard for me to relate.

    Answer by DDry at 9:29 AM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • I also just found out that my child that goes to school told me this morning that last friday I had some stuff I had to take care of in our old town. And so I called and asked them if the could pick my child up and watch him till I came home. She seemed fine with it, this morning my child said that my in law ( no names sorry) that was picking them up said I needed to get with the program, if I take them I need to pick them up. I just feel that they dont trust me. So I took my child to school and then they showed up and I said I already took him to school. she seemed a bit ajatated (sp?)

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:31 AM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • It sounds like they were just doing it temporarily to help you out in the beginning and now they think you should be able to handle it on your own. They do not want to do it anymore and that's understandable, it isn't their child. If you are available or can find a way to be available to take your child to school and pick him up yourself, then do it. Needing sleep in not a good excuse in my opinion but that's just me. I would see what other options you have and try to do this yourself.

    Answer by DDry at 9:35 AM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • I dont understand, what would I need help with, I have been doing this for 10 years, taking and picking my child up from school. This is just the way it is with them. And I didnt want them to take him in the 1st place. I wanted to but my DH and in laws convinced me this was the best for everyone.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:44 AM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • I would just do it and ket themn know you will no longer ask for their help, you didnt need it in the first place. But be nice!! In-laws can be, whats that word? EVIL!! lol, mine are at least!

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:12 AM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • sometimes teams divide up. Not a big deal. It's ok to just be an individual for a while. It's not the end of the game.

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:25 AM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • i would tell you (from personal experince) that we, as mothers, can't really count on no one for help with children.... sometimes not even their own fathers! ... the moms will have more responsability and more things on their minds from the get go...
    i dont know what to advice you.... but try to work it on ur own with ur spouse, excluding ur in-laws....
    i'm going thru the same thing... and that's what we did... cuz it wouldn't work out... they would just leave on trips and leave me hanging to pick my kid up... and having a full job, it was a little hard....
    but.... u know how it is...
    good luck!

    Answer by 85yeni78 at 10:48 AM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • I am cool with doing this myself. I'd rather it be that way. I dont want to have to call and make sure they are picking my child up, or whatever. I knwo I am going to be there I and I also know that he is getting where he needs to b, when he needs to be there. So this is just simpler, and less of a hassel. I just dont know why it is bugging me. LOL Thanks Mommas!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:04 AM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • Maybe this just isn't working out for the others and they don't know how to tell you. Just stop carpooling and drop it, don't let it get you down.

    Answer by MommyAddie at 11:23 AM on Mar. 10, 2009

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