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How do you build up your self -esteem?

I get easily hurt by people's remarks.Though I know my strengths and I'm proud of them,it doesn't seem enough.


Asked by countingsparows at 2:45 PM on Mar. 10, 2009 in Relationships

Level 8 (224 Credits)
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Answers (4)
  • If you figure this out let me know lol. I think we all care what others say and think, even if we say we do not. Things hurt! Try doing things that make you feel good about yourself. Or when someone says/does something that hurts you, take a breath and 1. ask yourself if this person knows you well enough to judge you.2. remind yourself of your strengths. and 3. Do not be afraid to say to them"wow that kinda hurt, did you mean it to sound that way?" because people do say things and do not realize how they come across sometimes.

    Answer by Bearsjen at 2:51 PM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • Bearsjen has good advice. I can add that whenever you can, speak well to and about others. Give praise where it is due- too often we forget to do this. Be kind to people doing their jobs well. Do volunteer work- this will raise your self-esteem also. If someone is mean to you, assume they are having a bad day, or that they are just mean people and so their opinion isn't worth all that much after all. :)

    Answer by Bmat at 3:25 PM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • Yes, peoples words do hurt, but they shouldn't hurt to the point that you cant recover from them. I have struggled for years with issues of bitterness towards people that seemingly rejected me in a comment, a look, an action. I then take those feelings and in an effort to NOT feel them, I put up walls of meaness and uncompassionism in an effort to "get them before they get me". I know that sounds SO dr phil, but its the truth. The key is knowing WHO you are and what youre about. Becoming secure in what you believe, who you are and where youre going is hard but its part of growing up. One of the things I figured out in my journey was that once I became secure in my decisions and I KNEW that I KNEW I was doing the right thing for me and for my kids, then nothing anyone can say about it bothers me. I think its the personal insults that always bothered me more and not peoples opinions about what I was doing or how I was doing it.

    Answer by momofsaee at 3:29 PM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • Luckily that I am in my 30's...its not often that someone insults me personally. Thats why being a teen is so hard. Kids have no problem dogging on one another about looks, weight or some other fault. Adults are much more subtle.

    Answer by momofsaee at 3:30 PM on Mar. 10, 2009