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How would you feel if your husband controlls All the money and expenses and you had 0 in your accounts.

My husband is good at finances but sometimes i need diapers or milk and i have to wait for him to get off work and get it. I'm a Stay home Mom and i Rarely spend anything on myself, mother of a 3 and 1 yr. old. Wondering if other moms out there in same boat.

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destinys1

Asked by destinys1 at 8:57 PM on Mar. 10, 2009 in Money & Work

Level 6 (130 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • Not really Im not..... I have a problem with being controlled and when it come to the money being withheld from me for control... No... that don't fly with me... If it was me I would get a job and if hes one of them guys that likes to chain women to the kitchen, then I would have left along time ago, or never married a man llike that in the first place. Life I said I have a BIG problem with control.
    soonmommyof3

    Answer by soonmommyof3 at 9:00 PM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • Thank God I control the money ...but if it were the other way around I would not like it I wouldn't be able to deal with something like that ...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:02 PM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • Agree,dont like the control issue in any way,shape or form. You are supposed to be equals even if you dont work outside the home,you have a big job with two children. Having to ask for money would NEVER fly with me,ever.
    guardmp_MOM

    Answer by guardmp_MOM at 9:10 PM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • Personally, I dont have this problem because there is NO WAY I would let him control all of the money. Regardless if you are a stay at home mom, you HAVE to have access to monies when needed. Debit cards are a god-send. Alot of times, my account will get low and I have a debit card to his. Swipe that baby, and hand him the receipt. On a nicer note, maybe just mention the problem. Explain that you need access to your money if you need it instead of having to wait to do the things you need to do i.e. when he gets home from work. If he has a problem with that, I would tell him...... well lets just try that first. Does he seriously expect HIS children to do without? I wouldnt think so. Which makes asking and talking it out more rational.
    cksem

    Answer by cksem at 9:10 PM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • Doesn't seem right to me, destinys1... my hubs and I have a joint account. Yes, we scrutinize eachother a bit, but we both have control over the finances. I stay at home too. You sound responsible, perhaps you should talk to him about this? If you want equal control, that is.
    sfwilson

    Answer by sfwilson at 10:35 PM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • Whom ever needs the money gets the money in our family. I control how the bills get paid and I keep track of them. I only get educational money and disability, but if he needs something I give it to him. If I needs something he gives it to me. We are both responsible with money, so it's really not an issue with us. If your husband has the money, obviously you have to get it from him. I really don't get the problem?
    coutterhill

    Answer by coutterhill at 11:09 PM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • You don't even have an ATM card??????

    Is your name on the accounts?

    If the answer to either of these is yes, that;'s a HUGE danger sign! Every woman should have equal access to the money without needing to ask for it.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 11:27 PM on Mar. 10, 2009

  • I always controlled the money even when we weren't married. I let him have an atm card which probably wasn't smart on my end but it is his money and he deserves to have access to it.
    I just make sure the bills get paid on time and that he isn't going over the limit on his credit cards. he is really bad with money.
    mommylovesu28

    Answer by mommylovesu28 at 2:20 PM on Mar. 11, 2009

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