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What do u think? i asked a question the other night about me and my SO sex life...not doing so great...i wanted some answers from other women..him and i have also talked about it...i posted anon..well...he got into my cafe mom and seen the he is problem is is that i dont think he shoould get into my personal stuff..thats y i joined cafe mom...he was getting into my myspace,my archives through im,my text messages..i have nothing to hide but i feel like i have nothing private!!!!! so i told him if he didnt wanna know he shouldnt have gotten into it!!! am i wrong?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 7:58 AM on Mar. 11, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • nope, you are right

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:02 AM on Mar. 11, 2009

  • You are right....but you might get further by discussing exactly what he is upset about. Is he upset that you are feeling this way, or is he upset that you posted it? Like you said, it is anonymous so his privacy is protected. Maybe he is uncomfortable with the whole subject...... But you also say he gets into all of your stuff....does he seriously not trust you? Is trust the real issue? Does he have trust issues? Maybe all of this is connected.....

    Answer by BJoan at 8:22 AM on Mar. 11, 2009

  • He deff has trust issues...thats my promblem with him getting into it...all he has done is text me saying i put our business out there...all kinds of crap...we have talked about the problem many times....he is 14 yrs older...i understand that....but get over it already!!! ive been with him for 4 yrs...its gettin real old...

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:26 AM on Mar. 11, 2009

  • Been there. He is trying to control you.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:15 AM on Mar. 11, 2009

  • There really isn't a wrong or right. Personally, I don't talk about my sex life because I feel it's disrespectful to my marriage, even as anon. My husband is the same way. We believe it's between us and only us. So if for some reason I did ask a personal question like that, he would be very insulted and I would be as well if he asked some men a question like that. Even if it's anon, it's still insulting. If you are really communicating with eachother about this problem, there is no need to be talking to random people about it. Marriage counseling is the only exception in my opinion. If you don't want him to see your Cafemom stuff, then just sign out after each time and make sure to choose a password he doesn't know.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:06 AM on Mar. 11, 2009

  • Tell him to get his insecurities in check... UGH! I go through the same controlling bs with my SO and at first it was annoying and now I want to ring his neck. "Put our business out there" - uhhh does he think people are going to somehow recognize you, despite being anonymous, and point and laugh??! This isn't the 3rd grade and he needs to get over it. It's one thing to give your man reassurance, but some of that needs to come from within.

    Answer by Candy423521 at 10:09 AM on Mar. 11, 2009

  • He sounds incredibly insecure.

    There's no reason why he should be mad at you for posing a sex question on a website full of mothers. Especially since you were modest enough to post it anonymously. No one knows who he is and no one is judging him.

    The only reason I could see him being upset is because you're turning to other women for advice regarding your sex life instead of going straight to him. But it's not something that should turn into a full-blown fight IMO. Now's your opportunity to discuss these issues with your husband.

    Answer by kimberleee382 at 4:42 PM on Mar. 11, 2009

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